The pie charts below shows the main reasons why agricultural land becomes less productive. The table shows how these causes affected three regions of the world during the 1990s (rewrite2)
Given are the pie chart and the table which illustrate the reasons of worldwide land destroyed and the percentages of land degraded by various reasons in three continents: North America, Europe and Oceania in the 1990s.
Overall, over-gazing by cattle was the major cause of land degradation in global. Comparing in three regions, the degradation rate of soil in European countries seems to have the worst than other regions.
Firstly, the major reason of less productivity of agricultural land in 1990s was over-gazing by animals, its took up to 35%, which was 5 times higher than the figure of miscellaneous factors. Moreover, the deforestation and the over-cultivation were also responsible for land degraded, as 30% was taken by the former reason and 28% was a proportion of over-cultivation.
Secondly, in three continents, Europe had the highest percentage of total land degradation with 23%, which was higher than the statistics in Oceania and North America by 10% and 18% respectively. In Europe, the deforestation accounted as the first rank from three reasons, while the over-cultivation was contributed the most in North America and the over-gazing was the major concern of destroying soil in Oceania, respectively.
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seems to have the worst than other regions.
Description: can you re-write this sentence? check books how to use '..er..than..', 'more...than'
Sentence: Firstly, the major reason of less productivity of agricultural land in 1990s was over-gazing by animals, its took up to 35, which was 5 times higher than the figure of miscellaneous factors.
Description: A determiner, possessive is not usually followed by a verb, past tense
Suggestion: Refer to its and took
while the over-cultivation was contributed the most
while the over-cultivation contributed the most
and the over-gazing was the major concern of destroying soil in Oceania, respectively.
Description: 'respectively' for what? it is not clear.
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 7 10
No. of Words: 194 200
No. of Characters: 1002 1000
No. of Different Words: 97 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.732 4.0
Average Word Length: 5.165 4.6
Word Length SD: 3.216 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 65 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 54 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 36 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 31 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 27.714 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.814 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.571 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.485 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.775 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.074 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4