Topic : The following appeared as an editorial in a local newspaper .
"In order to attract visitors to central plaza downtown & to return the plaza to its former glory ,the city should prohibit skateboarding there & instead allow skateboarders to use an area in Monroe Park.At Central PLaza ,skateboard users are about the only people to be seen,& litter & defaced property have made the plaza unattractive.In a recent survey of downtown merchants the majority supported a prohibition on skateboarding in Central Plaza .Clearly,banning skateboarding will make the area a place where people can congregate for fun or relaxation ."
The above argument has appeared in the local editorial newspaper, the arguer recommends that banning skateboarding will make the area a place where people can congregate for fun or relaxation. For the above support he provided some evidence that skateboard users are about the only people to be seen,& litter & defaced property have made the plaza unattractive, further survey of downtown merchants the majority supported a prohibition on skateboarding in Central Plaza. At first the evidence look quite convincing, but careful scrutiny states that the argument is not supporting and has flaws.
Firstly, the author states that, skateboard users are about the only people to be seen,& litter & defaced property have made the plaza unattractive. There may be chances the mall cleaning authority is not working properly in their shift. To convince the skateboarding team evidence is to provided that skateboarders are creating menace. Further, it can be possible that it might be the morning time or the school time that people did not appear in the mall.
Secondly, the litter and defaced property can be made by school students also. Might be there were some street guys who defaced the property. The must provided any sort of video recording that can prove that skateboarders are defacing the property to convince skateboarding committee.
Additionally, there was a survey of the downtown merchants,that majority supported a prohibition skateboarding in the plaza. The arguer failed to mention the method of survey, whether they was randomly selected, who were the people, those who failed to to sell their products in the mall. There may be chances that these merchants might have some sorts of quibble.
Lastly, there could be chances that its can be a economical distress, recession period that's why people have curbed their spending. It can be also possible that the store's may have outdated products or may not have fresh arrivals of clothes and shoes, because of this reason also people are not coming .There can be a plausibility that a new mall has opened in the neighborhood which is very much cheaper than the central plaza mall. How can be the arguer so much sure about banning skateboarding in central plaza will make the area a place where people can generates for fun and relaxation for this the arguer need to present evidence that before the skateboarding it was the sample place where people can generate for fun and relaxation.
Concluding ,the arguer fails to provide much evidence lead to weakening of its argument, further to strengthen his argument, author must provide evidence like video recording that skateboarders are creating the menace additionally, the economical condition in that quarter. The receipts that the store are having the latest brands.
Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
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2013-07-05 | ankitsakhuja | 80 | view |
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Sentence: At first the evidence look quite convincing, but careful scrutiny states that the argument is not supporting and has flaws.
Description: The fragment evidence look quite is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace look with verb, present tense, 3rd person singular
Sentence: To convince the skateboarding team evidence is to provided that skateboarders are creating menace.
Description: The token to is not usually followed by a verb, past participle
Suggestion: Refer to to and provided
Sentence: The arguer failed to mention the method of survey, whether they was randomly selected, who were the people, those who failed to to sell their products in the mall.
Description: The fragment , whether they is not usually followed by was
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace was with were
Description: The token to is not usually followed by an infinitival to
Suggestion: Refer to to and to
Sentence: There may be chances that these merchants might have some sorts of quibble.
Description: The token of is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to of and quibble
Sentence: Lastly, there could be chances that its can be a economical distress, recession period that's why people have curbed their spending.
Description: A determiner, possessive is not usually followed by a modal auxillary
Suggestion: Refer to its and can
Sentence: How can be the arguer so much sure about banning skateboarding in central plaza will make the area a place where people can generates for fun and relaxation for this the arguer need to present evidence that before the skateboarding it was the sample place where people can generate for fun and relaxation.
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by a verb, present tense, 3rd person singular
Suggestion: Refer to can and generates
Sentence: The receipts that the store are having the latest brands.
Description: The fragment that the store is not usually followed by are
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace are with is
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5
Don't put a space before punctuation marks.
Always put a space after punctuation marks. E-rater is sensitive.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 6
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 451 350
No. of Characters: 2281 1500
No. of Different Words: 191 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.608 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.058 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.689 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 167 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 122 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 91 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 46 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 25.056 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 13.439 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.331 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.594 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.086 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5