Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Younger school children (agedfive to ten) should be required to study art and music in addition to math, language,science and history.
Younger school children are already equipped with so many homeworks on math, science, language and history,pass a busy time for a better grade on those subjects and don't get enough time to play and enjoy their life. The growing competition that are observed now a daysin elementary schools are so extensive that young children have little time to pay heed on every math and science they enroll, let alone music and art. The ongoing discussion in the following passage will demonstrate the argument on behalf of taking math, science, literature and history class only.
First, art and music are not an easy subject, they are harder for adult also let alone young children. It requires extensive practice, a dedicated study and reharsal time to learn those. Furthermore, they are different in terms of content from math, science, history and literature. So, children always find it harder to perceive.
Second, learning music and art at the age of five to ten years is not so important as math and sciences. Most of the time children pass to learn science, technology, history and language becuase those are importnat subjects to achieve a good grade. At that age level, we need to teach them what is important for them. May be some of them will be a popular musician or a poet afterwards but this does not mean that they should take musics at their early age. There are several scientists who are proficient riting literature but did not take any subject realted with art at the early study period.
Finally, taking music and art in addition to math, science, history and language will cost an extra mental and psychological pressure to that kids. They are already busy and fully equipped with science and literature. If art and music are given then it will not only be an extra burden for them but also increase tension on their delightful student life.
Though art and music is required for human to understand and enjoy the meaning of life and its beauty, it is not the perfect time to study those subjects at the age level of five to ten. When young children will be in senior class then they can learn some parts of those for their interest. This does not mean that they should learn it from the very beginning of academic life.
In conclusion, art and musis should not be taken by young children in addition to math, science, literature and history.
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The growing competition that are observed
The growing competitions that are observed
Sentence: Finally, taking music and art in addition to math, science, history and language will cost an extra mental and psychological pressure to that kids.
Description: The token to is not usually followed by a conjunction, subordinating
Suggestion: Refer to to and that kids
Sentence: The growing competition that are observed now a daysin elementary schools are so extensive that young children have little time to pay heed on every math and science they enroll, let alone music and art.
Error: daysin Suggestion: ?
Sentence: It requires extensive practice, a dedicated study and reharsal time to learn those.
Error: reharsal Suggestion: rehearsal
Sentence: Most of the time children pass to learn science, technology, history and language becuase those are importnat subjects to achieve a good grade.
Error: importnat Suggestion: important
Error: becuase Suggestion: because
Sentence: There are several scientists who are proficient riting literature but did not take any subject realted with art at the early study period.
Error: riting Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: realted Suggestion: related
Sentence: In conclusion, art and musis should not be taken by young children in addition to math, science, literature and history.
Error: musis Suggestion: music
flaws:
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 23 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 412 350
No. of Characters: 1897 1500
No. of Different Words: 186 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.505 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.604 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.312 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 117 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 93 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 59 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 28 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.684 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.348 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.632 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.328 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.571 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.076 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5