We no longer need to have animals kept in zoos, so zoos should be closed. Do you agree or not?

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We no longer need to have animals kept in zoos, so zoos should be closed. Do you agree or not?

Talk about animals, in the last decade we face a certain threat toward the animal extinct, rude hunter and lack of control from government of poor country have made many animals face what we call “extinct”. Thus, one of the options to prevent those hunters is to put animals into the zoos.

During the development of technology, politic and regulation among the country on the earth finally have reached the agreement of regulation to protect the animals completely done and activated, and some people will conclude that zoos no longer become “home” for animal. But on the different point of view animal still need some protection and we need animal on the zoos on purpose to see the real wild live lies upon our eyes directly.

Animals near extinct also must isolate from with live to prevent lost of its species; many zoos have made a very wide place for the animal to serve them and make them feels like home. this is some effort of the zoo to attract many customers and also to protect the animal.

However, on certain points many case have been show up about how to maintain the zoos lives, its not cheap, and usually its only exist on a big city, because of the cost is very expensive and many zoos in critical condition still pretended to hold the animal inside mean while the animal very hungry, this what we call “must close case”

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2013-11-06 jackykeizen@gmail.com 65 view
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Sentence: Animals near extinct also must isolate from with live to prevent lost of its species; many zoos have made a very wide place for the animal to serve them and make them feels like home. this is some effort of the zoo to attract many customers and also to protect the animal.
Description: The fragment make them feels like is rare

Sentence: However, on certain points many case have been show up about how to maintain the zoos lives, its not cheap, and usually its only exist on a big city, because of the cost is very expensive and many zoos in critical condition still pretended to hold the animal inside mean while the animal very hungry, this what we call must close case
Suggestion: Can you re-write this sentence? A lot of errors.

flaws:
No. of Words: 240 350

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 6 15
No. of Words: 240 350
No. of Characters: 1074 1500
No. of Different Words: 133 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.936 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.475 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.061 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 67 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 47 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 18 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 14 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 40 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 14.652 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.833 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.512 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.819 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.243 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5