The number of old people around the world is increasing dramatically.
Could this have more positive or negative effects on society? or…
Do the advantages of the trend outweigh the disadvantages? or…
Is this a positive development?
Advancement in technology has made life easier. It is the fact that people now days doing less hard work compared to past. There is rapid improvement in areas like medical, quality of food because of faster development because of technology. Both are equality important in increasing life of a person. I believe that this is the reason in increasing of number of old people in the world. the other reason is change in attitude of people towards number of children they should have. In the past people in India had belief that they should have as many as children for support in their older edge. However due to education and awareness now people keep their families small which results in less number of children in the world. Therefore we are feeling drastic change in number of old people.
To begin with, I feel that this is a positive effect if considered in terms of medical ground. Number of old people increases only if they get good medical facilities and healthy food. Apart from some people say that people can live long life if he lives without stress on their mind and less responsibilities. This has become possible in recent time because government is taking responsibility of older people and provides them many facilities free of cost.
However, there may be additional burden on government because government has to give funds to this people in form of pension and providing them medical and shelter support because government does not get any funds in form of tax. Furthermore government has many other responsibilities of developing infrastructure, providing medical facilities to all citizens.
To Sum up, Increasing In number of old people is positive move and disadvantages of same can be overcome by giving some work to older people in government projects by which I feel government would be refunded .
Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
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2013-11-07 | shaishavrathod | 70 | view |
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Sentence: It is the fact that people now days doing less hard work compared to past.
Description: The fragment people now days is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace now days with nowadays
Sentence: Both are equality important in increasing life of a person.
Description: A noun, singular, common is not usually followed by an adjective
Suggestion: Refer to equality and important
Sentence: However, there may be additional burden on government because government has to give funds to this people in form of pension and providing them medical and shelter support because government does not get any funds in form of tax.
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to this and people
flaws:
No. of Different Words: 156 200
Don't start to develop ideas from introduction paragraph. Better like this:
para 1: introduction.
para 2: reason 1
para 3: reason 2
para 4: reason 3 (optional)
para 5: conclusion
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 307 350
No. of Characters: 1494 1500
No. of Different Words: 156 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.186 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.866 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.763 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 110 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 73 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 49 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 34 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.467 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.2 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.533 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.358 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.529 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.142 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5