The table and the bar chart below give information about traveling to work in Houston, Texas.
Summarise the inform by selecting and reporting the main futures, and make comparisons where relevant.
Both of table and bar chart give information about how people traveling to work in to work in Huston, Texas. The table shows the percentage of inhabitants commuting to work and average age of peoples used form of transport to go to their office. Moreover the bar chart shows comparing CO2 emission from each categories of transport.
As can be seen the most popular commuter traveled to work in Houston, Texas is car, nearly a half percent of peoples drive their car by themselves to go to office, the average age of traveler is forty seven years old. At the second place there are train or bus by more than a third percent inhabitants use this public transportation whit average age 47 years old. The percentage of travelers who used car with friends are eleven percent of forty four years old average age, and at the last place there are cycle or walk as types of transport, the percentage of ride the bicycle or pedestrians is under a very small number, it is 4% with average lifetime 39 years old.
The bar chart presents car drivers without friends gave big CO2 emission, as can be seen over 0,3 carbon dioxide emission by car-driver only. At the second position there are car with friends , driving private transportation with four friends gave carbonic acid gas over 0,05 and for public transport such as bus and train were small contribute to smog emission, just under 0,05 and for citizen who ride bicycle or makes a way by step didn’t gave acid rain emission.
In conclusion, the most popular genre of transportation gave big carbon dioxide emission and less current transportation didn’t contribute, it means that the awareness of inhabitants to their environment who bicycling or make a way by foot is high. However, citizen who drive car alone had careless of environment
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2013-11-14 | Fadlanmuzakki | 70 | view |
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Sentence: Moreover the bar chart shows comparing CO2 emission from each categories of transport.
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to each and categories
Sentence: In conclusion, the most popular genre of transportation gave big carbon dioxide emission and less current transportation didn't contribute, it means that the awareness of inhabitants to their environment who bicycling or make a way by foot is high.
Description: A WH-pronoun, nominative is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to who and bicycling
flaws:
No. of Words: 311 200 (write the essay in 20 minutes)
Don't need to go details. Need to Summarize and compare.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 10 10
No. of Words: 311 200
No. of Characters: 1447 1000
No. of Different Words: 150 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.199 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.653 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.626 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 87 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 74 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 45 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 30 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 31.1 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 15.783 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.415 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.682 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.132 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4