Pirouettes Ballet School is the clear choice for any child. Of all the dance schools in Elmtown, Pirouettes has the most intensive program, and our teachers have danced in the most prestigious ballet companies all over the world. Many of our students have gone on to become professional dancers with top dance companies.
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
Pirouttes ballet School is the best choice of any kid to learn dance. The author concludes this based on the assumption that this particular school has most intensive program , teachers who danced in the prestigious ballet organizations and many of the students are professional dancers associated with the top dance companies. However, after more light is shed on the issue and more detailed facts are concerned, lack of answers through argument leads me to question its validity.
First of all, how effective is the program offered? In other words, how good is the program for a beginner? How good are teachers for students who are obdurate. There might be a case where student cannot cope up with the program which is intensive and kid might feel stressed. Stress doesn't help in learning dance. If the above mentioned scenario is true, then the argument is weakened.
Secondly,if a dancer dances in an even which is reputated does that mean they are good teachers? Dancing is different and teaching dance is different. Every good dancer cannot be a good teacher. It is possible that a person can have extreme dance skills but no teaching skills. This doesn't help in teaching dance for the kids. if the above assumption is merit, then the argument does not hold water.
Finally, did every student who learnt the dance from the school is successful? The author states that many of the students are associated with the top organizations but what is the percentage of the success ratio of the students who learnt from the school.
To conclude, the argument, stands as of now, is flawed. However, if the author provides more evidence ans answers to the above questions, then argument can be evaluaated possibly.
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| 2020-01-01 | himanshu mardikar | 59 | view |
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 291 350
No. of Characters: 1384 1500
No. of Different Words: 152 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.13 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.756 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.477 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 97 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 72 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 54 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 24 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.167 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.493 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.556 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.303 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.545 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.061 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 64, Rule ID: AFFORD_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the infinitive: 'to dance'
Suggestion: to dance
... is the best choice of any kid to learn dance. The author concludes this based on the...
^^^^^
Line 1, column 175, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...icular school has most intensive program , teachers who danced in the prestigious ...
^^
Line 5, column 285, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...ive and kid might feel stressed. Stress doesnt help in learning dance. If the above me...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 309, Rule ID: AFFORD_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the infinitive: 'to dance'
Suggestion: to dance
...tressed. Stress doesnt help in learning dance. If the above mentioned scenario is tru...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 9, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , if
... the argument is weakened. Secondly,if a dancer dances in an even which is rep...
^^^
Line 9, column 284, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...nce skills but no teaching skills. This doesnt help in teaching dance for the kids. if...
^^^^^^
Line 9, column 328, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: If
...nt help in teaching dance for the kids. if the above assumption is merit, then the...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, finally, first, however, if, second, secondly, so, then, first of all, in other words
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 24.0 19.6327345309 122% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 12.9520958084 46% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 11.1786427146 54% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 11.0 28.8173652695 38% => OK
Preposition: 30.0 55.5748502994 54% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 9.0 16.3942115768 55% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1441.0 2260.96107784 64% => OK
No of words: 288.0 441.139720559 65% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.00347222222 5.12650576532 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.11953428781 4.56307096286 90% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.59443588633 2.78398813304 93% => OK
Unique words: 150.0 204.123752495 73% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.520833333333 0.468620217663 111% => OK
syllable_count: 430.2 705.55239521 61% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 3.0 8.76447105788 34% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 22.8473053892 66% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 54.3134944436 57.8364921388 94% => OK
Chars per sentence: 75.8421052632 119.503703932 63% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.1578947368 23.324526521 65% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.73684210526 5.70786347227 83% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.25449101796 133% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 6.88822355289 116% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.67664670659 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.264742923725 0.218282227539 121% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0746031319977 0.0743258471296 100% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0717335307061 0.0701772020484 102% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.127328893861 0.128457276422 99% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0815473815118 0.0628817314937 130% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.7 14.3799401198 67% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 64.71 48.3550499002 134% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.0 12.197005988 66% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.13 12.5979740519 88% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.62 8.32208582834 92% => OK
difficult_words: 59.0 98.500998004 60% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 11.1389221557 72% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.9071856287 67% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.