In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies.
Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide do this.
Youngsters theses days are popular to have a gap year between the ends of high school and the starts of university studies. They are advised to find a job or just travel around during the stop from study. The so-call gap year has its own merits but also afflicts with bad impacts.
To start with, juveniles who determine to do this can mould better characteristics in terms of tolerance and responsibility. Not surprisingly, they may confront with a complex environment and hard interpersonal relationship in the workplace, unlike on the campus, a beautiful and friendly fairy-tale; therefore, they have to get accustomed to the changes and learn how to tackle the problems well by themselves. Also, they are well-advised to shoulder the responsibilities. Furthermore, for the young people who choose to travel, they may enlarge their visions to the wonderful world. Enriching their experiences, the adolescents can not only distinguish right from wrong more directly, but ensure their objects for the sake of their future careers.
However, it may sometimes be a problem for the youths to experience what they are encouraged to. After fulfilling a sense of achievement at work, some young people would find themselves much more successful here than at school, especially the ones with bad marks. Unfortunately, they may drop out of school and continue to work, which is not the initial aim for the change. What is more, some needy youngsters might work at factories, doing the repeated jobs for earning money for the impoverished families. It is time-consuming as nothing new has been learned by them.
Generally speaking, it is no doubtfully a nice choice to work or travel in the middle of the study period, but parents and teachers, who play determinant roles in the growth of adolescents, are supposed to pay attention to the demerits of this action and instruct them to enjoy this gap year with a sensible and correct method.
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Sentence: Unfortunately, the may drop out of school and continue to work, which is not the initial aim for the change.
Description: The token the is not usually followed by a modal auxillary
Suggestion: Refer to the and may
Sentence: After fufilling a sense of achievement at work, some young people would find themselves much more successful here than at school, especially the ones with bad marks.
Error: marks Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: fufilling Suggestion: fulfilling
Sentence: What is more, some needy youngsters might work at factories, doing the repeatative jobs for earning money for the imporverished families.
Error: imporverished Suggestion: impoverished
Error: repeatative Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: Generally speaking, it is no doubtfully a nice choice to work or travel in the middle of the study period, but parents and teachers, who play determinant roles in the growth of adolescents, are supposed to pay attention to the dismerits of this action and instruct them to enjoy this gap year with a sensible and correct method.
Error: dismerits Suggestion: No alternate word
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 7.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
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No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 320 350
No. of Characters: 1576 1500
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Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.229 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.925 4.6
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No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 45 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
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Sentence Length SD: 12.75 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.714 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.303 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.528 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.055 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5