Benton City residents have adopted healthier lifestyles. A recent survey of city residents shows that the eating habits of city residents conform more closely to government
nutritional recommendations than they did ten years ago. During those ten years, local sales of food products containing kiran, a substance that a scientific study has shown reduces cholesterol, have increased fourfold, while sales of sulia, a food rarely eaten by the healthiest residents, have declined dramatically. Because of these positive changes in the eating habits of Benton City residents, we predict that the obesity rate in the city will soon be well below the national average.
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the prediction and the argument on which it is based are
reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the prediction.
Benton city residents might have adopted a healthier lifestyle which might mean the obesity rate in the city will soon reduce below national average, but the author has provided evidences that requires proper scrutinizing to decide the soundness of the claim. This evaluation, however, birth some questions that demand answers to decide the argument’s soundness.
The first leap however, is the author’s assumption that the city’s obesity rate will reduce below average because the people are leading a healthier life. The author based this healthiness on the consumption of food. The residents might have engage in other activities such as regular exercise, change of diets and many more. Thus, to determine the argument’s validity, the author needs to ask if the residence engage in other activities apart from consumption of some meal. If it is proven that the resident partake in exercises, then the argument is unsound. But, on the other hand, if the residents’ increase in healthier lifestyle is as a result of the consumption of kiran meal, then the argument is sound.
Furthermore, on the basis that a survey was carried out, the author assumes the city population is the same as it was ten years ago, thereby supporting the increase in the sale of kiran. The population must have increased over the period of ten which must have led to the increase in the sale of kiran. The population will, of course, not reduce or remain the same for ten years. Thus, the author need to ask if the population of the city has increased in a large extent or at a lesser extent to determine if there is an actual increase in the sale of kiran. If it is seen that the city’s population has increased tremeduously, then the claim that the sales of kiran has increased fourfold is valid. if not, the claim is invalid.
Additionally, based on the less consumption of sulia that is rarely eaten by ‘healthier people’, the author assumed sulia is dangerous. The author failed to show the nutritional value of sulia. Also, the author failed to show any vivid correlation between the consumption of sulia and being healthy. Therefore, the author needs to ask for the nutritional value of sulia to decide if it is harmful for consumption. If it is shown that the consumption of sulia is dangerous, then, the author’s claim that healthiest resident do not eat sulia is valid. If not, the claim is invalid.
Finally, the author assumed only kiran reduces cholesterol and failed to consider other products that the residence must have consumed. Kiran is only one of several products in market that reduces cholesterol. The author basing his claim on only the consumption of kiran and not the consumption of products that reduces cholesterol generally is flawed. Thus, the author need to ask if the sale of other cholesterol-reducing products are on the increase. If this turns out positively, then the claim is sound, if not, the claim is unsound.
In conclusion, the residents of Benton’s cholesterol level might reduce below the national leve because of their new adoption of a healthier lifestyle, but the author’s bases of this healthier lifestyle requires answers to some questions to determine its validity. Thus, the author might want to consider other factors that has led to the increase in the healthy lifestyle of the residents apart from the consumption of sulia and kiran.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 26 15
No. of Words: 566 350
No. of Characters: 2731 1500
No. of Different Words: 193 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.878 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.825 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.685 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 184 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 137 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 104 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 73 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.769 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.044 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.769 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.351 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.574 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.143 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 218, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...healthiness on the consumption of food. The residents might have engage in other ac...
^^^
Line 3, column 243, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Use past participle here: 'engaged'.
Suggestion: engaged
...ption of food. The residents might have engage in other activities such as regular exe...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 701, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: If
... kiran has increased fourfold is valid. if not, the claim is invalid. Additiona...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, furthermore, however, if, so, then, therefore, thus, apart from, in conclusion, of course, such as, as a result, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 26.0 19.6327345309 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.9520958084 100% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 13.6137724551 118% => OK
Pronoun: 26.0 28.8173652695 90% => OK
Preposition: 74.0 55.5748502994 133% => OK
Nominalization: 23.0 16.3942115768 140% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2837.0 2260.96107784 125% => OK
No of words: 566.0 441.139720559 128% => OK
Chars per words: 5.01236749117 5.12650576532 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.87757670434 4.56307096286 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.83176748531 2.78398813304 102% => OK
Unique words: 210.0 204.123752495 103% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.371024734982 0.468620217663 79% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 890.1 705.55239521 126% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Article: 21.0 8.76447105788 240% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 8.0 2.70958083832 295% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.22255489022 118% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 19.7664670659 137% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 57.1014787477 57.8364921388 99% => OK
Chars per sentence: 105.074074074 119.503703932 88% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.962962963 23.324526521 90% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.81481481481 5.70786347227 102% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.20758483034 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.67664670659 192% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.196491905182 0.218282227539 90% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0572339845095 0.0743258471296 77% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0546839360527 0.0701772020484 78% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.114845961146 0.128457276422 89% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0536844098088 0.0628817314937 85% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.6 14.3799401198 88% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 51.18 48.3550499002 106% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 12.197005988 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.78 12.5979740519 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.59 8.32208582834 91% => OK
difficult_words: 106.0 98.500998004 108% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 12.3882235529 93% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.