Some young adults want independence from their parents as soon as possible. Other young adults prefer to live with their families for a long time. Which of these situations do you think better? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.
Nowadays, more and more young adults choose to live with their family members although they are considered fully grown. While it was natural that physically mature members of a family should get independence as soon as possible in the past, the average age of young independent adults has increased every year. Although there can be a myriad of different circumstances that obstruct young adults from being independent from their families, I think that it is still better for them to be independent from their parents at the early stage.
Firstly, it must be a burden for parents to care about their grown children. It is highly probable that those parents get much old when their children become adults. Therefore, they should be concerned with their own life after retirement rather than be occupied with the life of their sons and daughters. These children become to have abilities and responsibility to make their own living at this phase and it is not desirable that they still rely on their parents to be provided with goods and services. A few years ago, one television program examined this problem by broadcasting a family conflict resulting from this phenomenon. In that family, 30 years old son had no job and depended on his parents for livelihood. He has spent a lot of time on playing video games and idling away and as a result, his mother got frustrated and irritated to a large extent and the problem did not seem to be solved unless the son starts to try to find a job and get independence. Therefore, it can be said that being independent would preclude conflicts between family members and lessen the burdens of parents.
In addition, independence is beneficial for children's own life in several aspects as well. For example, they can have more freedom and manage their affairs based on their own decisions. Although the recommendations or interventions of parents would be helpful to make better results in some cases, the children's actions or behaviors could be limited in this way. As they become adults, many of them become willing to find their own life styles. For instance, some of them may intend to decorate their rooms fit for their styles and interests and some others want to have pets inside the house. When they live with their parents, it would be harder to express their own lifestyles as the parents can be dissatisfied with the changes. In this situation, young adults can fulfill their own plans and satisfy their parents at the same time when they move to their own places.
In conclusion, it seems to be a better choice for young adults to be independent from their parents for both themselves and their parents. As aforementioned, children can have freedom of choice while parents can have lesser their burdens when these grown children choose to live alone.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2020-09-22 | tengriqagan | 77 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
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Suggestion:
Nowadays, more and more young adults cho...
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...from their parents at the early stage. Firstly, it must be a burden for parents...
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Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ers and lessen the burdens of parents. In addition, independence is beneficial ...
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Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...e when they move to their own places. In conclusion, it seems to be a better c...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, firstly, if, may, so, still, therefore, well, while, for example, for instance, i think, in addition, in conclusion, as a result, in some cases
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 15.1003584229 146% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 9.8082437276 153% => OK
Conjunction : 19.0 13.8261648746 137% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 60.0 43.0788530466 139% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 61.0 52.1666666667 117% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2326.0 1977.66487455 118% => OK
No of words: 478.0 407.700716846 117% => OK
Chars per words: 4.86610878661 4.8611393121 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.67581127817 4.48103885553 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.62899385513 2.67179642975 98% => OK
Unique words: 222.0 212.727598566 104% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.464435146444 0.524837075471 88% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 711.0 618.680645161 115% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.6003584229 97% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 47.2270049866 48.9658058833 96% => OK
Chars per sentence: 116.3 100.406767564 116% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.9 20.6045352989 116% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.5 5.45110844103 138% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.330626139199 0.236089414692 140% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.120331132854 0.076458572812 157% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0798867612382 0.0737576698707 108% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.253487837398 0.150856017488 168% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.071505400367 0.0645574589148 111% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.5 11.7677419355 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 58.1214874552 97% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.1575268817 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.26 10.9000537634 103% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.08 8.01818996416 101% => OK
difficult_words: 100.0 86.8835125448 115% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 10.002688172 145% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.