Last week you were on a flight to London. Unfortunately, when you left the plane, you left a bag. You did not remember about the bag until you got to your hotel.
Write a letter to the airline. Explain what has happened, describe the bag and its contents and say what you would like them to do about it.
Dear sir,
Last week, I have been in Auckland international airport to attend my flight to London. And then, I remembered my lost bag as soon as I arrived to my hotel.
The reason that drove me to forget my bag since I was in hurry because the taxi was driving so slowly due to a huge traffic jam; Then, I was really rushed as soon as I reached to the airport.
My bag is black with 5 pockets and it has zippers. And I have many personal stuff in it; Like: my wallet, my credit card, 10,000 dollars and my own Laptop.
If that is possible, I’d like you to conceal my bag in a box and mail it to me within 4 days at most. This bag has really valuable stuff that I’d really need for my work here in London. There will be a reward.
I’m looking forward to hear your response and I’d like to thank you in advance for caring to read this letter.
Best regards,
Omar Sheta
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2014-08-30 | Hiten | 87 | view |
| 2014-05-17 | Omar Sheta | 60 | view |
| 2014-02-01 | mamielts01 | 80 | view |
| 2014-01-30 | eddysuaib | 80 | view |
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Comments
I've fixed the flaws. Could
I've fixed the flaws.
Could you reevaluate the letter after the correction? If that won't be much of a trouble.
The score will be around 5.5
The score will be around 5.5 -6.0 even though the flaws are removed. You need to improve the language totally.
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flaws:
two 'because' in one sentence?
The reason that drove me to forget my bag since I was in hurry because the taxi was driving so slowly because there was a huge traffic jam
Need to improve the language, for example:
you: My bag is black, it has 5 pockets
better: My bag is black with 5 pockets
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 10 10
No. of Words: 179 200
No. of Characters: 688 1000
No. of Different Words: 108 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.658 4.0
Average Word Length: 3.844 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.076 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 42 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 23 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 7 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 2 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.9 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.094 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.4 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.391 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.77 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.158 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 4