Some people think that it is better for older schoolchildren to study a large number of subjects and develop a range of knowledge. Others argue that they should study a smaller number of subjects and focus on details. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
People have different views about the number of branches of learning that older students should learn at school and what we should teach and help them. While some people argue that older school children should be offered less discipline and their lessons should focus on details, I support the view that it is better for them to study more subjects and acquire more knowledge.
There are several reasons why people believe that increasing the number of disciplines at school and enabling them to develop as much knowledge as possible is superior for students. It is true that when the number of subjects grows, schoolchildren will be placed under pressure to have good educational outcomes in all subjects. Therefore, older students whose mental health is fully matured and can suffer from high pressure are more likely to acquire a tremendous amount of knowledge than the younger ones. Moreover, when schoolchildren get access to various branches of learning, this will lead to their comprehensive development. Consequently, this lays a sound concrete foundation for their future careers. It is also obvious that when schools teach older students more subjects and help them develop as much knowledge as possible, students will become flexible in their lives. For instance, students who only study math at school cannot calculate the amount of energy consumed by their family as well as students studying both math and physics.
In spite of the above arguments, I support the view that school should reduce the figure for disciplines that older schoolchildren study at school and they should focus on teaching their children more details about what they teach them. Firstly, if schoolchildren are offered less subjects to study and taught detailed lessons, they will gain a deeper insight into what they have learnt at school. The reason is that they do not encounter much pressure like those who have to acquire a range of subjects. Therefore, they can study more efficiently, have better comprehension of the topics taught at school and they also have more time to read more books or blogs on the Internet which are associated with their branches of learning to accumulate knowledge better. Furthermore, schoolchildren can develop their accomplishments at a particular subject. For example, students who are adept at math have more chances to get exposed to uphill math problems and detailed knowledge related to this subject because they do not have to learn various subjects so they can know skills that they need at this branch of learning in depth.
In conclusion, it seems to me that older schoolchildren should learn less subjects at school and their teachers should concentrate on teaching them detailed knowledge.
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Comments
Essay evaluations by e-grader
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 276, Rule ID: FEWER_LESS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'fewer'? The noun subjects is countable.
Suggestion: fewer
... Firstly, if schoolchildren are offered less subjects to study and taught detailed l...
^^^^
Line 4, column 70, Rule ID: FEWER_LESS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'fewer'? The noun subjects is countable.
Suggestion: fewer
... that older schoolchildren should learn less subjects at school and their teachers s...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, consequently, first, firstly, furthermore, if, moreover, so, therefore, well, while, for example, for instance, in conclusion, as well as, in spite of, it is true
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 13.1623246493 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 18.0 7.85571142285 229% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 14.0 10.4138276553 134% => OK
Relative clauses : 19.0 7.30460921844 260% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 49.0 24.0651302605 204% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 54.0 41.998997996 129% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.3376753507 36% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2289.0 1615.20841683 142% => OK
No of words: 441.0 315.596192385 140% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.19047619048 5.12529762239 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.58257569496 4.20363070211 109% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.72258651128 2.80592935109 97% => OK
Unique words: 198.0 176.041082164 112% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.448979591837 0.561755894193 80% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 667.8 506.74238477 132% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.60771543086 93% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 5.43587174349 166% => OK
Article: 1.0 2.52805611222 40% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.10420841683 143% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.76152304609 42% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 16.0721442886 100% => OK
Sentence length: 27.0 20.2975951904 133% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 55.3363296127 49.4020404114 112% => OK
Chars per sentence: 143.0625 106.682146367 134% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.5625 20.7667163134 133% => OK
Discourse Markers: 10.5 7.06120827912 149% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.01903807615 40% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.67935871743 115% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.9879759519 75% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 3.4128256513 88% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.309270468793 0.244688304435 126% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.117108765965 0.084324248473 139% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0632769039597 0.0667982634062 95% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.213680852365 0.151304729494 141% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0495989275756 0.056905535591 87% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.8 13.0946893788 128% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.53 50.2224549098 105% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.44779559118 42% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.6 11.3001002004 112% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.12 12.4159519038 106% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.09 8.58950901804 94% => OK
difficult_words: 87.0 78.4519038076 111% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 9.78957915832 133% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 10.1190380762 126% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.7795591182 121% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 276, Rule ID: FEWER_LESS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'fewer'? The noun subjects is countable.
Suggestion: fewer
... Firstly, if schoolchildren are offered less subjects to study and taught detailed l...
^^^^
Line 4, column 70, Rule ID: FEWER_LESS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'fewer'? The noun subjects is countable.
Suggestion: fewer
... that older schoolchildren should learn less subjects at school and their teachers s...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, consequently, first, firstly, furthermore, if, moreover, so, therefore, well, while, for example, for instance, in conclusion, as well as, in spite of, it is true
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 13.1623246493 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 18.0 7.85571142285 229% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 14.0 10.4138276553 134% => OK
Relative clauses : 19.0 7.30460921844 260% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 49.0 24.0651302605 204% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 54.0 41.998997996 129% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.3376753507 36% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2289.0 1615.20841683 142% => OK
No of words: 441.0 315.596192385 140% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.19047619048 5.12529762239 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.58257569496 4.20363070211 109% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.72258651128 2.80592935109 97% => OK
Unique words: 198.0 176.041082164 112% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.448979591837 0.561755894193 80% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 667.8 506.74238477 132% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.60771543086 93% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 5.43587174349 166% => OK
Article: 1.0 2.52805611222 40% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.10420841683 143% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.76152304609 42% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 16.0721442886 100% => OK
Sentence length: 27.0 20.2975951904 133% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 55.3363296127 49.4020404114 112% => OK
Chars per sentence: 143.0625 106.682146367 134% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.5625 20.7667163134 133% => OK
Discourse Markers: 10.5 7.06120827912 149% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.01903807615 40% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.67935871743 115% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.9879759519 75% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 3.4128256513 88% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.309270468793 0.244688304435 126% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.117108765965 0.084324248473 139% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0632769039597 0.0667982634062 95% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.213680852365 0.151304729494 141% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0495989275756 0.056905535591 87% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.8 13.0946893788 128% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.53 50.2224549098 105% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.44779559118 42% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.6 11.3001002004 112% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.12 12.4159519038 106% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.09 8.58950901804 94% => OK
difficult_words: 87.0 78.4519038076 111% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 9.78957915832 133% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 10.1190380762 126% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.7795591182 121% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.