Advertising is considered one of the most aspects in the commercial life. Nowadays we can see many different ways of advertising in the social media. The new advertising plays a selective purpose according to every culture. Some people believe that advertisements make their products look the same way that they actually are, while other might disagree. However, when it comes to me I really agree that advertisements exaggerate their promotion, and they do not deliver the product in the same way for two reasons which, I will demonstrate in the following essay.
To begin with, sometimes, advertisements mislead the customers with inaccurate message. Many companies try to do their best to sell their products no matter what they are. So, many companies keep trying to find message to get the customers convinced with their goods, and they made the people take the decision to buy that product according to what they saw during the promotion way. Unfortunately, some companies give the wrong message to the customer to get him excited to buy their products. For instance, my little daughter is five years old, and she used to watch many movies about dolls on YouTube. One a day, she watched advertise about frozen doll, and how that doll is so huge with very long hair. In fact, that was of offering that doll to the kids was so impressive. As a result, she got so motivated and insisted to have that doll. Consequently, she went with her dad to the toys shop and bought that toy. But, when she got home and opened the doll, she got shocked. This is because she found that her size is so small actually like one or two inches. In addition, the doll's shape is totally different than the doll that she saw it in advertise. So, she became totally upset and started to cry. This experience taught me that many organizations try to deliver unbelievable message to the customers to sell as much as they can from their products to make a tremendous profits.
In addition, some advertisements try to exaggerate the quality of their products. All companies and factories try to keep the customer convinced that their products are the most qualified products in the marker. Also, the consumers are always caring about the product's quality. For example, last year my brother was in need to buy a car. Actually, he went to many car dealers to find out which brand is the best. In fact, the dealers showed him many advertisements about ample types of car. Moreover, he started to decide to buy that car that show that it is more durable. In fact, he got this information through the advertising of that car. Unfortunately, this car was so weak, and it broke down after couple of months. So, the promotion of that car was completely fake. As you can see, this company provided their customers with wrong message about the quality.
In sum, I believe that advertisements are unrealistic. This is because they mislead their customers with wrong messages about their products, and because they keep giving the buyers exaggerated message about the product's quality.
- Tpo 28- integrated writing 71
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 95, Rule ID: NUMEROUS_DIFFERENT[1]
Message: Use simply 'many'.
Suggestion: many
...he commercial life. Nowadays we can see many different ways of advertising in the social media...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 1115, Rule ID: RATHER_THEN[2]
Message: Did you mean 'different 'from''? 'Different than' is often considered colloquial style.
Suggestion: from
...n, the dolls shape is totally different than the doll that she saw it in advertise. ...
^^^^
Line 3, column 1380, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'profit'?
Suggestion: profit
...rom their products to make a tremendous profits. In addition, some advertisements tr...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, consequently, however, if, look, moreover, really, so, while, for example, for instance, in addition, in fact, as a result, to begin with, in the same way
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 15.1003584229 126% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 13.8261648746 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 23.0 11.0286738351 209% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 74.0 43.0788530466 172% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 71.0 52.1666666667 136% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2537.0 1977.66487455 128% => OK
No of words: 524.0 407.700716846 129% => OK
Chars per words: 4.84160305344 4.8611393121 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.7844588288 4.48103885553 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.69613941312 2.67179642975 101% => OK
Unique words: 239.0 212.727598566 112% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.456106870229 0.524837075471 87% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 786.6 618.680645161 127% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 17.0 9.59856630824 177% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 6.0 1.86738351254 321% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 32.0 20.6003584229 155% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 20.1344086022 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 42.518918124 48.9658058833 87% => OK
Chars per sentence: 79.28125 100.406767564 79% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.375 20.6045352989 79% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.46875 5.45110844103 100% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8709677419 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 3.85842293907 233% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 11.0 4.88709677419 225% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.144096262144 0.236089414692 61% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0396006712652 0.076458572812 52% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0441083406165 0.0737576698707 60% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.106072798972 0.150856017488 70% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0518455012766 0.0645574589148 80% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.6 11.7677419355 82% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 63.7 58.1214874552 110% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.4 10.1575268817 83% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.5 10.9000537634 96% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.96 8.01818996416 87% => OK
difficult_words: 84.0 86.8835125448 97% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 10.002688172 90% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 10.0537634409 84% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.