Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea?
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Todays, money plays a crucial role in almost every aspect of our lives, and as a matter of fact, children are aware of this. Considering children’s sensitive and special mood, the role of prize in their life is undeniable. Keeping this fact in mind, some people are of the opinion that offering money as a prize to children for their high marks is a big mistake; however, some others believe that it will be effective for their future. Regarding this controversial issue, I am personally positive about offering money as a prize to children in return for their high marks. I feel this way for two reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.
First and foremost, children which have been encouraged in their life especially in education are more likely to be successful. This is because children can be stimulated by receiving money for their high grades and this could be a good way to encourage them for a fruitful education. Since almost all children are impatient, receiving money as the early consequence of their educational effort may make them satisfied with themselves and may make them more eager to study harder. According to recent researches conducted in some universities, it has been revealed that children who receive some money as a prize of their high marks are enthusiastic to try hard to get success in their education rather than the other school-age children. Moreover, would they have money in their pocket and spend it themselves, they might feel very proud and grown up.
Secondly, I think children are entered into the economic world in their earlier age by getting money in their school-age. This could boost their economic brain and make them ready for their future lives in term of economics which is one of the vital aspects of everyone’s life. My personal history is proof of this. My parents used to get some money as an award in return for my high grads. I remember when the first time I got the money, completely spent it on the first day. Therefore, I had no money to buy even a sandwich at the school until the next time when I got money prize for my high grade. Thus, I understood that I shouldn’t have spent the whole of money at once. Gradually, I learned that I’d better to save some. Furthermore, I tried to reduce the wasteful expenses and have an optimal money expending. In the other words, I learned to manage my budget. As a result, now I am able to manage my own company as well as an expert man.
To sum up, though some may oppose this idea, offering money to children for their high grades would be a great method which not only will encourage them for a high level education but also it could help them to learn the principle of economics by expending experience. Every parents should encourage their children for a perfect education and learned them the basic principles of their future lives such as economics.
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, furthermore, however, if, may, moreover, regarding, second, secondly, so, therefore, thus, well, i feel, i think, such as, as a matter of fact, as a result, as well as, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 15.1003584229 119% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 9.8082437276 143% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 13.8261648746 80% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.0286738351 109% => OK
Pronoun: 69.0 43.0788530466 160% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 61.0 52.1666666667 117% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2391.0 1977.66487455 121% => OK
No of words: 506.0 407.700716846 124% => OK
Chars per words: 4.72529644269 4.8611393121 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.7428307748 4.48103885553 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.63987904951 2.67179642975 99% => OK
Unique words: 243.0 212.727598566 114% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.48023715415 0.524837075471 92% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 761.4 618.680645161 123% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 15.0 9.59856630824 156% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.6003584229 112% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 60.562392643 48.9658058833 124% => OK
Chars per sentence: 103.956521739 100.406767564 104% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.0 20.6045352989 107% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.52173913043 5.45110844103 156% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.5376344086 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 11.8709677419 143% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 3.85842293907 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.365844848567 0.236089414692 155% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.107787232274 0.076458572812 141% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0856236991385 0.0737576698707 116% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.238100220854 0.150856017488 158% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0213822793958 0.0645574589148 33% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.8 11.7677419355 100% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 58.1214874552 99% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.15 10.9000537634 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.75 8.01818996416 97% => OK
difficult_words: 97.0 86.8835125448 112% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 10.002688172 140% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.