A recent study indicates that children living in the Himalayan mountain region in Nepal have lower levels of tooth decay than children living in suburban areas in the United States, despite the fact that people in the Himalayan mountain region in Nepal receive little to no professional dental care, while people in suburban areas in the United States see a dentist an average of 1.25 times per year. Thus, regular dental care is not helpful in preventing tooth decay.
Write a response in which you discuss one or more alternative explanations that could rival the proposed explanation and explain how your explanation(s) can plausibly account for the facts presented in the argument.
The region of 'Himalayan mountain' has one of the best environment in the world to maintain a healthy life. People of that region live a very different lifestyle and all those ups and downs of hills and the natural pureness make their body fit and strengthen their immune system. On the other hand 'United States' is one of the busiest and developed place in the world, People are busy with none physical works all day and most of the children prefer playing in computers rather then field. Those children's food habit is also different from the hilly regions of Himalayan. Without considering any of the facts, the author of the argument concludes that children in US have higher tooth decay rate because of 'regular dental care'.
Firstly, The author did not investigate other reasons like food habit, genetics, environment, etc and directly inculpate the dental care. Other then, tooth decay the 'Himalayan' region children may have fewer disease then US children but author did not find it necessary to investigate and give a authentic report of disease affected by 'Himalayan' children and 'United States' children.
Moreover, author did not mentioned the name of the source from where he get the data. From the author perspective, as the 'Himalayan' region have little dental care they should suffer more dental problem but does this thinking hold a strong ground? If we look through all the data and authentic charts we will find that people those like in hill tracts and naturally safe and pure area have fewer disease rate.
In a nutshell, author's whole idea of why United States children is having high 'tooth decay' rate does not make any sense. From his thought, Having a little number of heath care means larger amount of disease in that area where there are other factors such as environment, food habit, physical work are not important factor.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
flaws:
No. of Words: 313
more arguments wanted.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 12 15
No. of Words: 313 350
No. of Characters: 1503 1500
No. of Different Words: 169 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.206 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.802 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.276 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 108 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 65 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 47 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 27 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26.083 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.057 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.667 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.386 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.6 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.134 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 476, Rule ID: RATHER_THEN[1]
Message: Did you mean 'than'? 'than' is used for comparisons, 'then' is an expression of time.
Suggestion: than
...dren prefer playing in computers rather then field. Those childrens food habit is al...
^^^^
Line 5, column 139, Rule ID: OTHER_THEN[1]
Message: Did you mean 'other than'?
Suggestion: Other than
...and directly inculpate the dental care. Other then, tooth decay the Himalayan region child...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 294, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...nd it necessary to investigate and give a authentic report of disease affected by...
^
Line 8, column 26, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'did' requires the base form of the verb: 'mention'
Suggestion: mention
...children. Moreover, author did not mentioned the name of the source from where he ge...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 8, column 73, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'gets'.
Suggestion: gets
...ed the name of the source from where he get the data. From the author perspective, ...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, if, look, may, moreover, so, then, such as, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 6.0 19.6327345309 31% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 12.9520958084 23% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 11.1786427146 125% => OK
Relative clauses : 6.0 13.6137724551 44% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 18.0 28.8173652695 62% => OK
Preposition: 36.0 55.5748502994 65% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 16.3942115768 18% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1546.0 2260.96107784 68% => OK
No of words: 313.0 441.139720559 71% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.9392971246 5.12650576532 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.20616286096 4.56307096286 92% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.33745757343 2.78398813304 84% => OK
Unique words: 171.0 204.123752495 84% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.546325878594 0.468620217663 117% => OK
syllable_count: 478.8 705.55239521 68% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Article: 3.0 8.76447105788 34% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.22255489022 118% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 12.0 19.7664670659 61% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 26.0 22.8473053892 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 47.7146465983 57.8364921388 82% => OK
Chars per sentence: 128.833333333 119.503703932 108% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.0833333333 23.324526521 112% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.33333333333 5.70786347227 128% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 5.15768463074 78% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 5.0 5.25449101796 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 6.88822355289 15% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.264521850649 0.218282227539 121% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0987180249642 0.0743258471296 133% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0760293050725 0.0701772020484 108% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.162049744412 0.128457276422 126% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0688310029534 0.0628817314937 109% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.9 14.3799401198 104% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 53.55 48.3550499002 111% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 12.197005988 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.67 12.5979740519 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.8 8.32208582834 94% => OK
difficult_words: 57.0 98.500998004 58% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 12.3882235529 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 11.1389221557 111% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.