Some people believe that personal happiness is directly related to economic success. Others believe there are other factors. Discuss the two sides and give your opinion.
All people ever feel happiness in their life because we have feeling which show our emotion. Furthermore, a question has been grown regarding to whether happiness can directly affect people to be success in their business. However, others object this argument and believe that there are other factors which give more contribution to economic success. While, I believe that there are many factors that can give significant contribution to economic success including happiness.
Happiness is an emotion which belong in every human and give spirit to people whom feel it. People can be exiting and powerful when they are happy. It also can affect the result of what people do because it gives more passion, so people can feel more diligent and passionate to do their business. Morever, happiness affects people’s mood and it can affect the way of people’s work. Therefore, happiness always gives contribution to economic success.
On the other hand, there are other factors which can affect economic success beside happiness. Firstly, the successful of economic depends on hard work and diligent of people. When people eager to reach something and fight for it then it can directly give influence to economic condition. In other words, it is depends on people’s effort. Secondly, people can become success in their business when they receive help from other people. It has related with link or connection. People who have many link have more oppurtunities to be success in their business because it can make them easier to gain what they want.
In conclusion, happiness gives contribution to economic success indeed, but it does not give direct contribution. However, there are other factors such as people’s effort and link which can affect successful of economic directly.
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because we have feeling which show our emotion.
because we have feelings which show our emotions.
Sentence: Furthermore, a question has been grown regarding to whether happiness can directly affect people to be success in their business.
Description: The token to is not usually followed by a conjunction, subordinating
Suggestion: Refer to to and whether
give spirit to people whom feel it.
give spirit to people who feel it.
Sentence: Firstly, the successful of economic depends on hard work and diligent of people.
Description: An adjective is not usually followed by a verb, present tense, 3rd person singular
Suggestion: Refer to economic and depends
it is depends on people's effort.
it depends on people's effort.
Sentence: People who have many link have more oppurtunities to be success in their business because it can make them easier to gain what they want.
Error: oppurtunities Suggestion: opportunities
flaws:
Avg. Sentence Length: 15.889 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.216 7.5
No. of Different Words: 132 200
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.5 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 286 350
No. of Characters: 1452 1500
No. of Different Words: 132 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.112 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.077 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.498 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 113 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 84 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 52 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 27 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 15.889 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.216 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.667 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.415 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.544 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.14 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5