The argument sites a survey of 250 people betweeen the age of 30 and 45. Based on the result of the survey the writer claim that spending time online is linked to depression and people should spend limited time online.Both the survey results and writer's arguments are unconvincing has many inherent flaws.
Firstly the sample size of the survey. The survey was taken for 250 people adults. Judgment of a mere 250 people seems small to judge all adult population. Moreover the age group that was surveyed was between 30-45 this can no way represent whole adult population.Or rather is not enough to judge all people. Hence the survey should be more inclusive to convince me that spending time online is harmful to health.
The survey says that of adults who reported more than 30 hours per week online 20 % reported felling sad three times in last month.This data alone doesnt say that being online more then 30 hours leads to sadness as the data about people who are less than 30hours online is not given. What if 20% or more of the people who are online less then 30 hours reported being sad reported being sad. Than the whole argument falls apart the being online leads to sadness and depression.
Finally even if we ignore the survey's data gathering flaws it mentions of people being sad ,down,blue or having trouble having concentration although these are signs of depression it cannot be concluded without proper professional consultancy. The writer quickly jumps to conclusion stating that spending time online leads to depression. which weakens the argument.
In sum, The survey as well as the conclusion has various flaws and missing information because of which the argument is unconvincing.
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Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 13 15
No. of Words: 291 350
No. of Characters: 1389 1500
No. of Different Words: 148 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.13 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.773 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.341 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 101 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 58 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 40 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 19 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.385 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 12.749 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.538 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.397 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.613 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.179 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 219, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Both
...people should spend limited time online.Both the survey results and writers argument...
^^^^
Line 1, column 281, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...s and writers arguments are unconvincing has many inherent flaws. Firstly the ...
^^
Line 3, column 157, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Moreover,
...ms small to judge all adult population. Moreover the age group that was surveyed was bet...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 265, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Or
...no way represent whole adult population.Or rather is not enough to judge all peopl...
^^
Line 3, column 310, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
...ther is not enough to judge all people. Hence the survey should be more inclusive to ...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 132, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: This
...d felling sad three times in last month.This data alone doesnt say that being online...
^^^^
Line 5, column 148, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...ree times in last month.This data alone doesnt say that being online more then 30 hour...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 182, Rule ID: COMP_THAN[2]
Message: Comparison requires 'than', not 'then' nor 'as'.
Suggestion: than
...alone doesnt say that being online more then 30 hours leads to sadness as the data a...
^^^^
Line 5, column 339, Rule ID: COMP_THAN[2]
Message: Comparison requires 'than', not 'then' nor 'as'.
Suggestion: than
... more of the people who are online less then 30 hours reported being sad reported be...
^^^^
Line 5, column 392, Rule ID: SENT_START_THEM[1]
Message: Did you mean 'Then'?
Suggestion: Then
... reported being sad reported being sad. Than the whole argument falls apart the bein...
^^^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Finally,
...ine leads to sadness and depression. Finally even if we ignore the surveys data gath...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 31, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'surveys'' or 'survey's'?
Suggestion: surveys'; survey's
...ssion. Finally even if we ignore the surveys data gathering flaws it mentions of pe...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 62, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...nore the surveys data gathering flaws it mentions of people being sad ,down,blue ...
^^
Line 7, column 92, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...g flaws it mentions of people being sad ,down,blue or having trouble having conce...
^^
Line 7, column 98, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , blue
...s it mentions of people being sad ,down,blue or having trouble having concentration ...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 340, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Which
...ending time online leads to depression. which weakens the argument. In sum, The surv...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 340, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “which” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ending time online leads to depression. which weakens the argument. In sum, The surv...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
finally, first, firstly, hence, if, moreover, then, well, as well as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 19.6327345309 97% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 12.9520958084 31% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 11.1786427146 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 13.0 28.8173652695 45% => OK
Preposition: 25.0 55.5748502994 45% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 9.0 16.3942115768 55% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1425.0 2260.96107784 63% => OK
No of words: 287.0 441.139720559 65% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.96515679443 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.11595363751 4.56307096286 90% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.49281132741 2.78398813304 90% => OK
Unique words: 153.0 204.123752495 75% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.533101045296 0.468620217663 114% => OK
syllable_count: 419.4 705.55239521 59% => syllable counts are too short.
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Article: 5.0 8.76447105788 57% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 19.7664670659 71% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 77.5615950094 57.8364921388 134% => OK
Chars per sentence: 101.785714286 119.503703932 85% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.5 23.324526521 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.85714285714 5.70786347227 85% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 17.0 5.25449101796 324% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 1.0 8.20758483034 12% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 10.0 6.88822355289 145% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.67664670659 64% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.302616584945 0.218282227539 139% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.104957747478 0.0743258471296 141% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0644553126523 0.0701772020484 92% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.149938495962 0.128457276422 117% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0801182768216 0.0628817314937 127% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.2 14.3799401198 85% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 48.3550499002 123% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.55 12.5979740519 92% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.87 8.32208582834 95% => OK
difficult_words: 59.0 98.500998004 60% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 12.3882235529 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.9071856287 84% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.