"Of the two leading real estate firms in our town — Adams Realty and Fitch Realty — Adams Realty is clearly superior. Adams has 40 real estate agents; in contrast, Fitch has 25, many of whom work only part-time. Moreover, Adams' revenue last year was twice as high as that of Fitch and included home sales that averaged $168,000, compared to Fitch's $144,000. Homes listed with Adams sell faster as well: ten years ago I listed my home with Fitch, and it took more than four months to sell; last year, when I sold another home, I listed it with Adams, and it took only one month. Thus, if you want to sell your home quickly and at a good price, you should use Adams Realty."
According to the homeowners’ letter, Adams Realty is superior than Fitch Realty. As evidence to his claim, he compared the number of real estate agents and revenue. But number of real estate agents and revenue without the measure of profit cannot be an indicator of superiority. Also, he states one example of his selling experience with both the realties, which is not enough to evaluate which one superior, and there is also a certain degree of anachronism in the argument.
The homeowner says that because Adams Realty has more real estate agents than Fitch Realty, it is superior than the other. This cannot be a clear indicator of success. While Adams has more agents than Fitch, the effectiveness of greater number of agents is not clear from the argument. May be Fitch’s agents are more qualified than Adams’s, which compensates for the less number and part time working. So qualifications of the agents are important to make such a claim.
The homeowner also states that the revenue of Adams was twice last year than that of Fitch’s. But higher revenue does not indicate higher profit. May be the cost of Adams was higher than Fitch, which the author didn’t mention. It is very likely that due to less number of agents some of whom are part time workers, Fitch might have less overhead costs than that of Adams. The argument also compared the higher average sales of house of Adams to the lower sales of Fitch. But it fails to mention what kind of house the two realties sold. Are they similar in size or quality? Are they located in the same neighborhood? These are crucial points that are required for analysis before coming to a conclusion. Again, the data about revenue and average sales provided was of only one year, which might not be sufficient to determine the superiority.
As a support to his argument, the homeowner mentions his personal experience of selling houses with both the realties. However, the two events took place 10 years apart, which is a large difference in time. Many things could change in the course of 10 years. For instance, the economy might be going down 10 years ago, which can explain the reason behind the longer time to sell the house with Fitch. May be people were not very interested in buying house 10 years ago. He also failed to provide the selling prices of the houses he enlisted with the realties, which leaves yet another question unanswered.
Therefore, the homeowner’s claims need to be backed up by stronger evidences he did not consider. And more information have to be collected in order to reach a proper conclusion.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
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| 2020-01-30 | nadia_tavakoli | 16 | view |
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 26 15
No. of Words: 447 350
No. of Characters: 2080 1500
No. of Different Words: 203 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.598 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.653 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.348 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 146 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 91 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 57 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 30 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.192 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.475 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.538 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.277 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.479 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.119 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 68, Rule ID: SUPERIOR_THAN[1]
Message: The adjective superior is normally used with 'to'.
Suggestion: to
...' letter, Adams Realty is superior than Fitch Realty. As evidence to his claim,...
^^^^
Line 5, column 108, Rule ID: SUPERIOR_THAN[1]
Message: The adjective superior is normally used with 'to'.
Suggestion: to
...gents than Fitch Realty, it is superior than the other. This cannot be a clear indic...
^^^^
Line 5, column 394, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...ich compensates for the less number and part time working. So qualifications of the agent...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 156, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[8]
Message: The proper name in singular (May) must be used with a third-person verb: 'is'.
Suggestion: is
...ue does not indicate higher profit. May be the cost of Adams was higher than Fitch...
^^
Line 9, column 307, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
... less number of agents some of whom are part time workers, Fitch might have less overhead...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 3, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...nt to determine the superiority. As a support to his argument, the homeowner...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, may, so, therefore, while, for instance, kind of
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 27.0 19.6327345309 138% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.9520958084 85% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 11.1786427146 98% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 13.6137724551 110% => OK
Pronoun: 22.0 28.8173652695 76% => OK
Preposition: 58.0 55.5748502994 104% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 16.3942115768 79% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2185.0 2260.96107784 97% => OK
No of words: 446.0 441.139720559 101% => OK
Chars per words: 4.89910313901 5.12650576532 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.5955099915 4.56307096286 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.62207628407 2.78398813304 94% => OK
Unique words: 215.0 204.123752495 105% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.482062780269 0.468620217663 103% => OK
syllable_count: 681.3 705.55239521 97% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 5.0 1.67365269461 299% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 19.7664670659 137% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 22.8473053892 70% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 37.0838592925 57.8364921388 64% => OK
Chars per sentence: 80.9259259259 119.503703932 68% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.5185185185 23.324526521 71% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.66666666667 5.70786347227 47% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.25449101796 114% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 8.20758483034 158% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.67664670659 171% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.236017440045 0.218282227539 108% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0681969798358 0.0743258471296 92% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0804156193338 0.0701772020484 115% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.132369011881 0.128457276422 103% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0958854813108 0.0628817314937 152% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.9 14.3799401198 69% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 63.7 48.3550499002 132% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.4 12.197005988 69% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.84 12.5979740519 86% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.79 8.32208582834 94% => OK
difficult_words: 95.0 98.500998004 96% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 11.1389221557 75% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.9071856287 67% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.