Pirouettes Ballet School is the clear choice for any child. Of all the dance schools in Elmtown, Pirouettes has the most intensive program, and our teachers have danced in the most prestigious ballet companies all over the world. Many of our students have gone on to become professional dancers with top dance companies.
This promotional passage for the Pirouettes Ballet School posits that because the school employs world-renowned dancers and has a history of producing skilled dancers, it will be the perfect choice for any child. The passage operates on multiple unspoken assumptions and the writer has several questions to answer before anyone should take the recommendation seriously.
The first questionable claim the arguer makes is that the Pirouettes Ballet School is the "clear choice for any child." To suggest that the school is the right fit for any child is extraordinarily bold. Perhaps a child is already busy with soccer, basketball, and math competitions but she want to try out dancing just to see what it is like. It hardly seems that the "most intensive program" is the correct choice for that child. Or perhaps a teenager has grown tired of his childhood sports and wants to try a dance class for the first time. Putting him in a class of dancer supposedly destained for positions at top dance companies is unwise. To claim the Pirouettes Ballet School is unparalleled in its rigor, and also that it is the perfect fit for every child is insupportable and hurts the credibility of the argument as a whole.
Another questionable assumption the argument makes is that those world-renowned dancers will be equally skilled teachers. The arguer offers no reason as to why this is true and there is plenty of evidence from other sports that suggests the opposite. If one were to look up the most successful NBA coaches they would find a paucity of past All Stars. Rather, they would see that many of the most talented coaches were role players or in some cases supporting stars. Take, for example, Steve Kerr who was unquestionably good in his prime but was not at the top of the league in the way he is as a coach. The same is true for soccer, baseball, and many other sports; it entirely is feasible that this trend holds in dance.
The last piece of evidence that argument uses also requires some clarification. Specifically, how long had those dancers who went on to professional roles danced with Pirouettes Ballet School? If the school had taken them in at two or three years old and built them from the ground up into world-class dancers, then this part of the argument holds water and is worth considering. But there is no guarantee this is the case. It is possible that the Pirouettes Ballet School's reputation as a rigorous program attracted older dancers who were already talented. Perhaps the school intensively markets a high-level dance program for talented 16 to 18 year olds. If this were the case, skilled teenagers would pour in from surrounding areas to be trained for only two years before becoming professionals. Pirouettes Ballet School could then claim credit for these student's success even though a different academy trained them for most of their lives.
Before this recommendation and argument has any teeth, its writer must expand on several pieces of evidence. Namely, are the school's teacher's as talented in instruction as they are in dance and for how long did they train the students who became professionals? Even if both of these questions are answered in favor of the Pirouettes Ballet School, the arguer's claim that the school is the correct choice for "any" child is unfounded and over extended.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2020-01-01 | himanshu mardikar | 59 | view |
| 2019-12-17 | srujanakeerthi | 77 | view |
| 2019-12-15 | Chayank_11 | 33 | view |
| 2019-12-05 | Opak Pulu | 69 | view |
| 2019-11-05 | Prudhvi6054 | 79 | view |
- Many lives might be saved if inoculations against cow flu were routinely administered to all people in areas where the disease is detected. However, since there is a small possibility that a person will die as a result of the inoculations, we cannot permi 33
- Pirouettes Ballet School is the clear choice for any child. Of all the dance schools in Elmtown, Pirouettes has the most intensive program, and our teachers have danced in the most prestigious ballet companies all over the world. Many of our students have 82
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 26 15
No. of Words: 565 350
No. of Characters: 2717 1500
No. of Different Words: 267 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.875 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.809 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.672 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 183 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 129 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 86 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 54 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.731 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.711 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.538 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.283 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.471 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.093 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 301, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'she' must be used with a third-person verb: 'wants'.
Suggestion: wants
...sketball, and math competitions but she want to try out dancing just to see what it ...
^^^^
Line 9, column 252, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ther sports that suggests the opposite. If one were to look up the most successful...
^^
Line 13, column 859, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'students'' or 'student's'?
Suggestion: students'; student's
...chool could then claim credit for these students success even though a different academy...
^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, look, so, then, as to, for example, in some cases
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 35.0 19.6327345309 178% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.9520958084 62% => OK
Conjunction : 19.0 11.1786427146 170% => OK
Relative clauses : 17.0 13.6137724551 125% => OK
Pronoun: 45.0 28.8173652695 156% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 59.0 55.5748502994 106% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 16.3942115768 85% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2814.0 2260.96107784 124% => OK
No of words: 565.0 441.139720559 128% => OK
Chars per words: 4.98053097345 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.87542086881 4.56307096286 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.81363049521 2.78398813304 101% => OK
Unique words: 267.0 204.123752495 131% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.472566371681 0.468620217663 101% => OK
syllable_count: 843.3 705.55239521 120% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 5.0 1.67365269461 299% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 19.7664670659 126% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 41.0580077451 57.8364921388 71% => OK
Chars per sentence: 112.56 119.503703932 94% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.6 23.324526521 97% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.84 5.70786347227 50% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 8.20758483034 171% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 6.88822355289 116% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.67664670659 64% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.364139551145 0.218282227539 167% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0973441883255 0.0743258471296 131% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0847734295066 0.0701772020484 121% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.209818578187 0.128457276422 163% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0739052264758 0.0628817314937 118% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.3 14.3799401198 92% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 48.3550499002 119% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.9 12.5979740519 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.83 8.32208582834 94% => OK
difficult_words: 111.0 98.500998004 113% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 12.3882235529 117% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.