TPO26-It is better for children to choose jobs that are similar to their parents’ jobs than to choose jobs that are very different from their parents’ job.
Nowadays, finding a proper and well-paid job has played a pivotal role in individuals' life. Everyone strive to find decent job after graduation from university. In this regards, some people believe children have this option that choose their parent occupation. On the other hand, other group think it is very advantageous for them if they choose different jobs. I concur with the latter group notion, and I will elaborate on my viewpoint in the following paragraphs.
Firstly, people, especially youngster, desire to choose jobs that are interesting for them. One of the most imperative factors should be considered by people when they seeking for job is interest and passion towards that job. In the most case, people spend most of their time in their workspace, so if they have not excitement about that they will not be successful in their occupations. Therefore, it is possible that if children continue their parent's job, they will quit their jobs or have a bad moments in that works. For instance, imagine someone who likes to work in bank, but his father is a teacher. What factor can guarantee his success if he choose to be a teacher rather than bank employee. Thus, it can be easily concluded that choosing a preferable job play a very decisive role in everyone's future satisfaction and progress.
In addition, there are a plethora of new jobs that are not available in the past. It is very evident that technology are progressing in galloping pace and it provided numerous job opportunity for individuals. For instance, most of the jobs that are related to computer such as IT engineering, data analysis, programming, etc. were not in the last decades. So , if someone are interested in these kinds of works, he has not this chance to choose this jobs if he continue his parent jobs. Furthermore, some of the jobs that were very common and well-paid in the past, nowadays are obsolete. Additionally, because the technology progress machines are replaced by humans in some occupations.
To wrap it up, I am of the opinion that children must choose different jobs than their parent jobs. Their decision will provide the more opportunity. Not only can they follow their interest, but also they can choose new and updated jobs.
- Extra 2- Integrated writing 3
- TPO 37 Integrated writing 29
- TPO 24- Integrated 76
- It is more enjoyable to have a job where you work only three days a week for long hours than to have a job where you work five days a week for shorter hours 73
- It’ s the best way for teachers to help students become more interested in a subjectby explaining how this subject can help students live better outside the school. 76
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 165, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...ob after graduation from university. In this regards, some people believe children h...
^^^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...iewpoint in the following paragraphs. Firstly, people, especially youngster, d...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 460, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... that if children continue their parents job, they will quit their jobs or have a...
^^
Line 3, column 507, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'moment'?
Suggestion: moment
...they will quit their jobs or have a bad moments in that works. For instance, imagine so...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 620, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... bank, but his father is a teacher. What factor can guarantee his success if he c...
^^
Line 3, column 661, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'chooses'.
Suggestion: chooses
... factor can guarantee his success if he choose to be a teacher rather than bank emplo...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 670, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...an guarantee his success if he choose to be a teacher rather than bank employee. ...
^^
Line 3, column 850, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...yones future satisfaction and progress. In addition, there are a plethora o...
^^^^
Line 5, column 364, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...g, etc. were not in the last decades. So , if someone are interested in these kind...
^^
Line 5, column 378, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'someone' must be used with a third-person verb: 'is'.
Suggestion: is
...ot in the last decades. So , if someone are interested in these kinds of works, he ...
^^^
Line 5, column 467, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'continues'.
Suggestion: continues
...t this chance to choose this jobs if he continue his parent jobs. Furthermore, some of t...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 506, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
... continue his parent jobs. Furthermore, some of the jobs that were very common and well-pai...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, furthermore, if, so, therefore, thus, well, for instance, in addition, such as, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 15.1003584229 126% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 9.8082437276 102% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.0286738351 127% => OK
Pronoun: 52.0 43.0788530466 121% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 41.0 52.1666666667 79% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1866.0 1977.66487455 94% => OK
No of words: 377.0 407.700716846 92% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.94960212202 4.8611393121 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.4064143971 4.48103885553 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.7432318968 2.67179642975 103% => OK
Unique words: 198.0 212.727598566 93% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.525198938992 0.524837075471 100% => OK
syllable_count: 585.9 618.680645161 95% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.6003584229 107% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.1344086022 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 29.1682565486 48.9658058833 60% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 84.8181818182 100.406767564 84% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.1363636364 20.6045352989 83% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.63636363636 5.45110844103 103% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 12.0 5.5376344086 217% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8709677419 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.471686571761 0.236089414692 200% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.137070372334 0.076458572812 179% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.10253639562 0.0737576698707 139% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.307587776147 0.150856017488 204% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0366803536326 0.0645574589148 57% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.5 11.7677419355 89% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 58.1214874552 93% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 10.1575268817 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.13 10.9000537634 102% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.12 8.01818996416 101% => OK
difficult_words: 87.0 86.8835125448 100% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 10.002688172 75% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.0537634409 88% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.