The following appeared in a memo from the director of a large group of hospitals.
"In a controlled laboratory study of liquid hand soaps, a concentrated solution of extra strength UltraClean hand soap produced a 40 percent greater reduction in harmful bacteria than did the liquid hand soaps currently used in our hospitals. During our recent test of regular-strength UltraClean with doctors, nurses, and visitors at our hospital in Worktown, the hospital reported significantly fewer cases of patient infection (a 20 percent reduction) than did any of the other hospitals in our group. Therefore, to prevent serious patient infections, we should supply UltraClean at all hand-washing stations, including those used by visitors, throughout our hospital system."
Writer assumed that if Ultraclean hand soap will enter in the hospital system than the infection could be decrease to some extend but writer argument is lack of evidence about new soap and fails to gain the conclusion.
Writer stated that in controlled laboratory they tested extra strength UltraClean solution and in fact in hospitals they tested with regular strength and last they want to supply ultraclean soap to the hospitals but haven’t provided the concentration of the soaps at all stages were not provided so if they use only ultraclean than may be infection will not decrease.
Further, writer stated during test patient infection significantly decrease to 20 percent. It would be the case that at that time hospital was clean so harmful bacteria was not present.Author haven’t provided information that whether they have also use another soap or not,besides they had used another soap than infection definitely decrease. Maybe at test time admitted patients had not decease which could infect to other people. It would be the case that they tested on only non-infected persons.so,writer haven’t provide the information about the test how much time they tested,how many people tested etc.
Author have tested on only hospital in worktown and jumped to the conclusion but it’s too early to predict same effect remains in all other hospitals.Maybe worktown hospital was located in crowded area so that probability of infection was high.It would be the case that other hospitals have more patient of infected decease and in case they replace the new soap and may it would not affect the patient’s infection.
Last but not least,Author assumed that new soap effect was same in normal infection and serious infection but that is not necessary that serious infection bacteria also removed by Ultraclean soap.Again Author haven’t provided the bacteria level.
In sum,Argument was convincing at first sight however at deep analysis it is found to be rife with loopholes and assumption and that was seriously weaken the writer’s conclusion.
Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 9 15
No. of Words: 342 350
No. of Characters: 1687 1500
No. of Different Words: 153 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.3 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.933 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.499 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 121 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 90 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 65 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 37 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 38 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 18.355 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.667 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.434 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.8 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.109 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 124, Rule ID: SOME_EXTEND[1]
Message: Did you mean 'extent' ("extent" is a noun, "extend" is a verb)?
Suggestion: extent
...the infection could be decrease to some extend but writer argument is lack of evidence...
^^^^^^
Line 9, column 186, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Author
...ean so harmful bacteria was not present.Author haven't provided information that ...
^^^^^^
Line 9, column 255, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: 'used'.
Suggestion: used
...information that whether they have also use another soap or not,besides they had us...
^^^
Line 9, column 278, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , besides
...r they have also use another soap or not,besides they had used another soap than infecti...
^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 395, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: 'deceased'.
Suggestion: deceased
... at test time admitted patients had not decease which could infect to other people. It ...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 508, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , writer
...y tested on only non-infected persons.so,writer haven't provide the information ab...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 593, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , how
...about the test how much time they tested,how many people tested etc. Author hav...
^^^^
Line 13, column 156, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Maybe
...e effect remains in all other hospitals.Maybe worktown hospital was located in crowde...
^^^^^
Line 13, column 250, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: It
... that probability of infection was high.It would be the case that other hospitals ...
^^
Line 17, column 19, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , Author
...pos;s infection. Last but not least,Author assumed that new soap effect was same i...
^^^^^^^
Line 17, column 197, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Again
...acteria also removed by Ultraclean soap.Again Author haven't provided the bacter...
^^^^^
Line 21, column 7, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , Argument
...provided the bacteria level. In sum,Argument was convincing at first sight however a...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 21, column 148, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'weakened'.
Suggestion: weakened
...s and assumption and that was seriously weaken the writer's conclusion.
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, first, however, if, may, so, in fact
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.6327345309 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 12.9520958084 77% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 11.1786427146 134% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 13.6137724551 95% => OK
Pronoun: 27.0 28.8173652695 94% => OK
Preposition: 37.0 55.5748502994 67% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 16.3942115768 104% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1774.0 2260.96107784 78% => OK
No of words: 329.0 441.139720559 75% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.39209726444 5.12650576532 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.25891501996 4.56307096286 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.94901442835 2.78398813304 106% => OK
Unique words: 151.0 204.123752495 74% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.45896656535 0.468620217663 98% => OK
syllable_count: 538.2 705.55239521 76% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 0.0 8.76447105788 0% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.70958083832 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 9.0 19.7664670659 46% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 36.0 22.8473053892 158% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 107.158242282 57.8364921388 185% => OK
Chars per sentence: 197.111111111 119.503703932 165% => OK
Words per sentence: 36.5555555556 23.324526521 157% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.22222222222 5.70786347227 109% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 13.0 5.25449101796 247% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 3.0 8.20758483034 37% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0893273166416 0.218282227539 41% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0417597146309 0.0743258471296 56% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0467595253604 0.0701772020484 67% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0557445120789 0.128457276422 43% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.049999646539 0.0628817314937 80% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 22.2 14.3799401198 154% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 34.94 48.3550499002 72% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.1628742515 156% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 17.3 12.197005988 142% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.57 12.5979740519 116% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.17 8.32208582834 110% => OK
difficult_words: 78.0 98.500998004 79% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 27.0 12.3882235529 218% => Linsear_write_formula is high.
gunning_fog: 16.4 11.1389221557 147% => OK
text_standard: 27.0 11.9071856287 227% => The average readability is very high. Good job!
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.