Choosing one’s college major is not an easy job. It is not uncommon for new entering students to ruminate on this decision for months or even years. According to the prompt, some people suggest that students follow their heart to choose a field they are passionate about, while others believe that students should choose their major based on jobs availability. In my opinion, I strongly agree with the former suggestion that students should look inward rather than outward when choosing a field of study for two reasons.
First of all, job availability for different industry and field is dynamic. Once popular job may be an outdated one in the next decade. Therefore, choosing one’s major mainly based on job availability is to take a short-term perspective, which will be a potential risk in this fast-changing world. For instance, from the 1950s through the 1980s, manufacturing was dominating national economics in Asia countries. During the time, students with mechanical engineering would find loads of jobs with high salaries. However, after 1990s, with the boom of Internet, market demand for hardware was replaced by software, and consequently mechanical engineering jobs soon gave way to software engineering jobs. The above example illustrates that job market is highly dependent on unpredictable factors. If students basically choose their major on job availability, assuming that job market is stable, then they may face difficulties at some point in the future.
Further, work performance is highly related to one’s talents and interests. In this competitive world, one who wants to standout from the others has to have passion on what he or she is doing so as to lead to the extraordinary performance. Consider a student who has no talents in quantitative field but really loves foreign literature; however, she chooses computer science as her major because of the technology boom with hundreds of thousands of jobs related to programming, what would her world be like? After graduation, she would become a software engineering facing a world full of codes she has no passion in, and thus with limited outcome and career growth. While every time she comes back home and sees an article from her favorite author on newspaper, she has to ask herself again if her life can be better if she chooses what she loves instead of what the world needs. She would be neither happy nor having sense of achievement, which is unlikely to lead to a successful career. This example demonstrated that choosing a field without own interests and talents will do harm to one’s productivity and happiness. On a macro scale, if people in the society all choose to devote to popular jobs instead of what they really love, the whole society will suffer from lower productivity and less diversity.
Some may argue that current job market is extremely competitive, so students should make preparation at school, and choosing a major with job availability is a secure way. However, it is because of the high competence in the job market that students should follow their own passion, since it is more likely to lead to a good quality of work performance and thus make them the outstanding ones and carve out a niche for themselves. Therefore, people should always listen to their inner voice when making decisions.
- TPO-29:Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? To improve the quality of education, universities should spend more money on salaries for university professors. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. 70
- Some people believe that college students should consider only their own talents and interests when choosing a field of study. Others believe that college students should base their choice of a field of study on the availability of jobs in that field.Writ 79
- All parents should be required to volunteer time to their children's schools. 62
- TOEFL T P O 28 - Integrated Writing Task 3
- Investments in life saving technology are more valuable than investments in technology related to entertainment or luxury 73
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ng a field of study for two reasons. First of all, job availability for diffe...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 82, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Once” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ifferent industry and field is dynamic. Once popular job may be an outdated one in t...
^^^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...culties at some point in the future. Further, work performance is highly rela...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 203, Rule ID: SO_AS_TO[1]
Message: Use simply 'to'
Suggestion: to
...have passion on what he or she is doing so as to lead to the extraordinary performance. ...
^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...wer productivity and less diversity. Some may argue that current job market i...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 15, Rule ID: MASS_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: 'argues'.
Suggestion: argues
...ty and less diversity. Some may argue that current job market is extremely co...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, consequently, first, however, if, look, may, really, so, then, therefore, thus, while, as to, for instance, first of all, in my opinion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 19.5258426966 108% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.4196629213 129% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 14.8657303371 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.3162921348 124% => OK
Pronoun: 42.0 33.0505617978 127% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 75.0 58.6224719101 128% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 12.9106741573 77% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2786.0 2235.4752809 125% => OK
No of words: 546.0 442.535393258 123% => OK
Chars per words: 5.10256410256 5.05705443957 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.83390555256 4.55969084622 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.82598299292 2.79657885939 101% => OK
Unique words: 279.0 215.323595506 130% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.510989010989 0.4932671777 104% => OK
syllable_count: 861.3 704.065955056 122% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 6.24550561798 128% => OK
Article: 2.0 4.99550561798 40% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 3.10617977528 225% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 3.0 1.77640449438 169% => OK
Preposition: 10.0 4.38483146067 228% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.2370786517 114% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 23.0359550562 100% => OK
Sentence length SD: 59.2955813998 60.3974514979 98% => OK
Chars per sentence: 121.130434783 118.986275619 102% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.7391304348 23.4991977007 101% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.08695652174 5.21951772744 117% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 7.80617977528 77% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 10.2758426966 136% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 5.13820224719 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.83258426966 103% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.315659276066 0.243740707755 130% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0920395150726 0.0831039109588 111% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0969189738734 0.0758088955206 128% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.220523761047 0.150359130593 147% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.117304138775 0.0667264976115 176% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.5 14.1392134831 103% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 48.13 48.8420337079 99% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 12.1743820225 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.6 12.1639044944 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.33 8.38706741573 99% => OK
difficult_words: 123.0 100.480337079 122% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 11.8971910112 88% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 11.2143820225 100% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.7820224719 93% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 79.17 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.75 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.