Some say that because many people are living much longer, the age at which people retire from work should be raised considerably.To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

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Some say that because many people are living much longer, the age at which people retire from work should be raised considerably.
To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

Today, by dint of both economic and medical improvement, the life expectancy of human is increasing sharply, which means people now have more time to enjoy their life. Therefore, some people insist that we should increase the retired age of people significantly. In my opinion, I strongly disagree with this idea.

Admittedly, it is claimed that thanks to the juniors work longer, we can take advantages of their enormous experience and knowledge. As a result, the organizations still have the good consultants for the difficult situation. Ironically, only when the old staffs retire could we have more opportunities for the younger generation, which is the prospect of the country. Thereby, the seniors will have to work harder to strengthen their experience as well as their skills and become the leaders in the future. More over old people tend to be conservative and it is not good for the circumstances, which we need changes. For instance, only after the junior manager in my uncle's company retired and replaced by the younger one, could the company take place the reform to overcome the crisis.

On the other hand, it is undeniable that by virtue of increasing the age which people retire from work, the government could reduce the burden of pension. Hence, the government has more budget to invest in health care system for old people. Nevertheless, the paradox here is that though old staff can not work as effectively as they did before, they still receive a very high salary because of their experience. As a consequence, it leads to a large waste of resources for not only the companies but also the government. For example, some old staff in my uncle company usually go for work very late and return home very late but their salary still double many hard working young staff.

In conclusion, even though people now are living longer, the government should keep the retired age unchanged in the near future.

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Average: 6.9 (7 votes)
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only after the junior manager in my uncle's company retired and replaced by the younger one
only after the junior manager in my uncle's company is retired and replaced by the younger one

in my uncle company
in my uncle's company

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Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 324 350
No. of Characters: 1556 1500
No. of Different Words: 172 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.243 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.802 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.562 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 110 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 70 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 43 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 34 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.6 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.227 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.733 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.327 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.527 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.085 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5