CLAIM: Young people’s tendency to make extensive use of portable devices like
smartphones and tablets has hurt their development of social skills.
REASON: These devices encourage users to form artificial personalities and relationships
online rather than fully and honestly engaging with the people around them.
The topic claims that portable devices have led to a decline in the development of social skills. The reason presented for this outcome is that it encourages artificial personalities and relationships. I mostly agree with the claim that it has hurt young people's social skills. This phenomenon has not affected the older generations as deeply because they have lived without and remember when engaging with people around you was necessary for a social life. These devices have led to less real-life connections and many dangerous artificial masks.
First of all, when reading artificial relationships, I think of the new trend of catfishing. People posting false profiles with names and faces that are not their own to lure people into interacting with them. This is a way for some to feel a sense of love and romance in a life that feels lacking, but some use it to hurt others. There are many cases of victims fooled into believing they have found love or even losing money.
Secondly, cyberbullying has led to many catastrophic outcomes. With portable devices, bullies are able to torment others without fear of consequence. Many youtube users take pleasure from victimizing other people's video blogs with comments they would never make in person. This need to hurt and humiliate another person might stem from their own traumas, but they are fearful to face those in the real world. This has led to many cases of suicide in the victim.
Granted, there are young people who don't feel confident in social situations and often find their only meaningful connections can happen behind a screen. The development of portable devices allows for anxious persons to still feel a sense of community. Without this ability to test the waters and find someone like-minded in a safe environment, they may find themselves isolated altogether. Innovations such as dating applications and social media have allowed for connections that might otherwise never have blossomed. This could very well lead to in-person interactions and deep connections in the future, regardless of how they began. The reliance on these devices in young people is what is detrimental to full honest communication skills. Many teenagers can say they are spending time with friends but in reality, every individual's eyes are glued to their own phone.
In conclusion, I mostly agree with the statement and conclusion of this claim. There are some benefits to this innovation but the magnitude of the power and attention young people give this virtual reality is harmful to their social development.
- The following editorial appeared in the Lamont Times newspaper."During last year’s election, only 35 percent of people living in Lamont voted, whereas inthe nearby affluent town of Chiswick, that number was 75 percent. In a recent survey ofyoung ad 16
- The following appeared in a memorandum from the manager of WWAC radio station."WWAC must change from its current rock-music format because the number of listeners has been declining, even though the population in our listening area has been growing. 77
- CLAIM Young people s tendency to make extensive use of portable devices like smartphones and tablets has hurt their development of social skills REASON These devices encourage users to form artificial personalities and relationships online rather than ful 63
- Learning is primarily a matter of personal discipline; students cannot be motivated by school or college alone. 70
- Some people believe that traveling to and living in numerous places increases one s ability to relate and connect to other people Others believe that this ability is better cultivated by living in one place and developing a deep understanding of that comm 74
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 13, column 37, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
... Granted, there are young people who dont feel confident in social situations and...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, if, may, second, secondly, so, still, well, i think, in conclusion, such as, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 19.5258426966 72% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.4196629213 64% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 14.8657303371 114% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.3162921348 80% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 40.0 33.0505617978 121% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 61.0 58.6224719101 104% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 12.9106741573 93% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2161.0 2235.4752809 97% => OK
No of words: 419.0 442.535393258 95% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.15751789976 5.05705443957 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.52432199235 4.55969084622 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.74265779505 2.79657885939 98% => OK
Unique words: 225.0 215.323595506 104% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.536992840095 0.4932671777 109% => OK
syllable_count: 670.5 704.065955056 95% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 6.24550561798 160% => OK
Article: 4.0 4.99550561798 80% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.10617977528 32% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.77640449438 113% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.38483146067 68% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.2370786517 114% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 23.0359550562 78% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 30.8450606966 60.3974514979 51% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 93.9565217391 118.986275619 79% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.2173913043 23.4991977007 78% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.39130434783 5.21951772744 84% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 7.80617977528 13% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 10.2758426966 107% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 5.13820224719 156% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.83258426966 83% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.250913513859 0.243740707755 103% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0784355829682 0.0831039109588 94% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0759354778805 0.0758088955206 100% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.140627237408 0.150359130593 94% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0789956829524 0.0667264976115 118% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.0 14.1392134831 85% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 53.21 48.8420337079 109% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 12.1743820225 85% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.65 12.1639044944 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.49 8.38706741573 101% => OK
difficult_words: 105.0 100.480337079 104% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 11.8971910112 76% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.2143820225 82% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.7820224719 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.