Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school.
Do you think this is a good idea?
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Nowadays, educational matters is considered as an important element in each person's life. Therefore, parents use various method in order to encourage their little kids to study harder. personally, I believe setting some financial rewards for students is a great idea for making them pay more attention to their lessons. I have two main reasons for my point of view, which will be explored in the following essay.
To begin with, parents have different ways for convincing their kids to spend more time on their assignments in order to get better final scores. Although each rewards has it's own advantages, I believe givin money is the best, because juveniles will be able to buy what ever they like. my own experience is a compelling example for this reality. When I was a high school student my father used to set some amount of money as a reward for me. because of earning that money. I did all my best in my school works and most of the time got the best grade in each course's final test. After getting the gift I went to a city mall and buy those stuff which I had been thinking about them all the time. I belive most of my good scores in my school period were due to my father's awards.
Secondly, as a parents individuals ought to teach some life lesson to their little kids. One of the crucial lessons can be the fact that in order to have something we must work hard. Imagine a boy who has a dream about buying a new version of playstation. His father can either but it for him or tell him he will give a money exactely as much as a device price if the boy can get high mark in his exam. By doing so, not only he will be encouraged to study hard but also he will completely understand if a peson want something he must work for it and sacrifice some other unimportant aspects of his life. For instance, he needs to avoid playing with his friends and focus more on his educational materials. Thanks to my father by doing such method, thesedays, I am totally aware about this fact in my life and I will do the same for my future kid or kids.
To make the long story short, according to the aforementioned arguments, I am of an opinion that setting a money as a reward for students in order to push them to work harder on their studying is a great idea. By this way, those adolescents can buy what everthey want not what their parents like, besides, this can be a crucial lecture for their entire life that they need to work for their dream and they can not have what ever they want easily.
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- tpo34 80
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- TPO 48 Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement Because modern life is very complex it is essential for young people to have the ability to plan and organize 73
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 77, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'persons'' or 'person's'?
Suggestion: persons'; person's
...sidered as an important element in each persons life. Therefore, parents use various me...
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Line 1, column 186, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Personally
...rage their little kids to study harder. personally, I believe setting some financial rewar...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 286, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: My
...ill be able to buy what ever they like. my own experience is a compelling example ...
^^
Line 2, column 696, Rule ID: PRP_RB_NO_VB[1]
Message: Are you missing a verb?
...een thinking about them all the time. I belive most of my good scores in my school period w...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 106, Rule ID: A_UNCOUNTABLE[1]
Message: Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply 'money'.
Suggestion: money
...uments, I am of an opinion that setting a money as a reward for students in order to pu...
^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 282, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...an buy what everthey want not what their parents like, besides, this can be a cru...
^^
Line 4, column 373, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ure for their entire life that they need to work for their dream and they can not...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, if, second, secondly, so, therefore, for instance, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 15.1003584229 86% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 9.8082437276 163% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 65.0 43.0788530466 151% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 55.0 52.1666666667 105% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2032.0 1977.66487455 103% => OK
No of words: 468.0 407.700716846 115% => OK
Chars per words: 4.34188034188 4.8611393121 89% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.65116196802 4.48103885553 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.37626820779 2.67179642975 89% => OK
Unique words: 235.0 212.727598566 110% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.502136752137 0.524837075471 96% => OK
syllable_count: 644.4 618.680645161 104% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 49.6616214394 48.9658058833 101% => OK
Chars per sentence: 96.7619047619 100.406767564 96% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.2857142857 20.6045352989 108% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.0 5.45110844103 73% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.5376344086 126% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8709677419 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.259963428371 0.236089414692 110% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0747904655107 0.076458572812 98% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0453444021271 0.0737576698707 61% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.160101823127 0.150856017488 106% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0426148034289 0.0645574589148 66% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.2 11.7677419355 87% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 66.07 58.1214874552 114% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 8.19 10.9000537634 75% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.46 8.01818996416 93% => OK
difficult_words: 81.0 86.8835125448 93% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.