Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Students are more influenced by their teachers than by their friends.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Do you really think that students are more influenced by their teacher than by their friends? Although it can be argued that teachers have the most effects on the students rather than their friends, I disagree that they influence more than their friends. There are many reasons that demonstrate my viewpoint, but there are three important reasons that persuade me to put forward this idea. First and foremost, they have good relationship by their friends, who are in the same age; furthermore, they spend more hours by their friends rather than their teachers, and lastly, the teacher`s role does not seem interesting for the teenagers.
First of all, underestimating the significance of the friend and classmate`s effects on the teenagers, is not logical. It is axiomatic, most of the teenagers in the specific period of their teen-ages consider their friends as a reference; they mostly have miscommunication with their elder. In this condition, they follows their friends paths instead of their parents or teacher`s advices, and sometimes they act just opposite their parents and teacher`s requires. It illustrates how the teenager students are influenced by their friends and not by their teachers.
Secondly, a part of what I have mentioned above, another factor that should be taken into consideration is the periods that students mostly spend. It is crystal clear that the connection between the teacher and student is hold on the school schedule, they do not have any extra meeting or activity out of the school, thus they have a limited period to be together. In contrast, most of the students extend their connection with their friends after the school too. Maybe they go to another class or participate in a social activity or do the assignments together. In deed they do a lot of activities that strengthen their links and in this case, they can easily affect from each other.
Finally, having discussed the issue from that point of view, I would rather discuss it from another perspective. Most of the students define the teacher and his role as strike person that is just aimed to deliver and convey some basic data and information. This feature cannot consider as an interesting manner and feature; however, their friends with different personality and manner who provide different tastes and exciting experiences seem attractive. Thus, it can be a convincing evidence for their election.
Putting all of the above mentioned factors in to consideration the following conclusion can be drawn about the topic that the students are more influenced from their friends than by their teacher because they are in the same age, they spend more hours with them, and finally, their manners and tastes seem more attractive.
Sentence: First and foremost, they have good relationship by their friends, who are in the same age; furthermore, they spend more hours by their friends rather than their teachers, and lastly, the teachers role does not seem interesting for the teenagers.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to teachers and role
Sentence: First of all, underestimating the significance of the friend and classmates effects on the teenagers, is not logical.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to classmates and effects
the connection between the teacher and student is hold on the school schedule,
the connection between the teacher and student is held on the school schedule,
Sentence: In this condition, they follows their friends paths instead of their parents or teachers advices, and sometimes they act just opposite their parents and teachers requires.
Description: The fragment teachers requires . is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace requires with verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Description: A pronoun, personal, nominative, not 3rd person singular is not usually followed by a verb, present tense, 3rd person singular
Suggestion: Refer to they and follows
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to friends and paths
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to teachers and advices
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Words: 447 while No. of Different Words: 203
Don't need to list reasons in the introduction and conclusion both. This will create duplicated content.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 21 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 447 350
No. of Characters: 2227 1500
No. of Different Words: 203 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.598 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.982 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.622 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 156 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 126 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 79 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 46 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.833 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.404 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.611 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.329 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.547 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.076 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5