The graph below shows the growth in mobile phone ownership in six countries in the European Union (EU).
The bar chart gives the information about a number of mobile phones which are owned by people in six different countries over a 5-year period, it measured in millions.
At first glance, it is noticeable that the ownership of cellular phones in all countries listed was quite as higher in the end of the period as that in 2000. However, while the most significant growth in mobile phone owners in 2005 was Germany, Spain experienced the smallest quantity of the ownership during the remainder of the time.
Turning to the UK, Germany, and Italy, whereas the number of hand phones in the countries stood at similar level in 2000, 2005 recorded bear no similarity in the figure. The three countries started at approximately four millions in the millennium year, and then there was a slight increase in the owners in the next following year. The country of the land of idea witnessed a considerable increase to 14 million in 2005, although the quantity of the ownership was three times as much in 2000 as in 2005, from just over 4 million in the starting point to 12 million in the next period. In any case, the sum of ownership in Italy in 2005 was two-and-a-half times higher than 2000.
A closer look at the data in other countries, Spain was the smallest growth in the ownership. While 2005 was an upward trend in the number of mobile phone owners in the country, the sum was much smaller than Sweden and France which soared to 7 and 8 million in the end of the period.
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| 2015-03-09 | Fadlanmuzakki | 79 | view |
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The bar chart gives the information about a number of mobile phones which are owned by people in six different countries
Description: it is not addressed properly for 'The graph below shows the growth in mobile phone ownership in six countries'
was quite as higher in the end of the period as that in 2000
was quite higher in the end of the period than that in 2000
while the most significant growth in mobile phone owners in 2005 was Germany,
while the ...growth ... was in Germany,
higher than 2000.
higher than that in 2000.
Spain was the smallest growth in the ownership
Spain has the smallest growth in the ownership
While 2005 was an upward trend in the number of mobile phone owners in the country,
While 2005 was the year with an upward trend in the number of mobile phone owners in the country,
Sentence: Turning to the UK, Germany, and Italy, whereas the number of hand phones in the countries stood at similar level in 2000, 2005 recorded bear no similarity in the figure.
Description: A verb, past participle is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to recorded and bear
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
No. of Words: 265 200
Write the essay in 20 minutes.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 9 10
No. of Words: 265 200
No. of Characters: 1179 1000
No. of Different Words: 125 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.035 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.449 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.435 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 82 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 50 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 36 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 23 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 29.444 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.896 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.778 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.463 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.691 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.108 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4