annual coffee and meat consumption in 7 countries

Essay topics:

annual coffee and meat consumption in 7 countries

The bar graphs elucidate the annual consumption of coffee and meat in seven countries.

It is evident from the graph the coffee was the least consumed among seven countries. The meat was the most intake food in Europe and USA regions whereas it was the least intake in Eastern Asia countries (Russia, China and Japan).

USA had eaten the most amount of meat of 122 kg per person, whereas the coffee was the lowest consumption as 4 kg per person in a year. Germany had the next highest figures for the meat consumption (87 kg per person) whilst they took 7 kg of coffee per person. The figures for the meat intake for French people and Norman recorded at 72 kg per person and 60 kg per person respectively. The coffee consumption in Norway was the highest consumption compared to other countries - Norway of 9 kg per person and France of 5 kg per person.

In contrast to the figures for the other countries, the amount of meat and coffee intake in Eastern Asia regions was comparatively less; China of 47 kg per person and 2 kg per person; Japan of 42 kg per person and 3 kg per person, and Russia of 45 kg per person and 5 kg per person, respectively.

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Comments

whereas the coffee was the lowest consumption
whereas the coffee has the lowest consumption

flaws:
No. of Words: 213 while No. of Different Words: 82

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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.5 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 8 10
No. of Words: 213 200
No. of Characters: 915 1000
No. of Different Words: 82 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.82 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.296 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.417 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 70 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 31 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 18 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 14 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26.625 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 12.786 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.375 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.561 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.813 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.335 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4

Submitted by YS89 on Fri, 12/11/2015 - 20:05

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Why would this essay score of 5.5?

Where could I improve in my writing?

Should I need to compare more data or should I reorganize the essay?

Thanks,