Read and think about the following statement: pets should be treated like family members.
Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons to support your opinion.
Although there is no simple answer on this question and I can see the foundations on which those distinct opinions about the issue are based, I profoundly believe that pets ought to be treated like a part of a family because of the reasons which are discussed in details below.
To begin with, there is no doubt that animals and human beings are not equal in many ways, for instance, a punishment for killing or murdering a person and an animal are incomparable. What is more, it is widely believed that animals have no consciousness and therefore they have no right or free will. In other words, there is no equality between an owner and his or her pet. However, may we aver that pets should not be treated like family members?
The answer on this question is "no", perhaps, because of subjective reasons. In fact, I surmise that each individual who has even owned a pet will agree with the statement that a pet has inevitably become a friend and a part of familiy. I can speak from my own expereince. In my childhood when I lived on a farm, we had many domisticated animals and I was allowed to have my own dog. This happy animal which was initially treated without respect from other members of family has gain it when it protected me from other dogs which attacked me. Although the dog was badly hurt, it managed to fulfill its duty.
Today this dog is dead but it still has its place in my heart. Besides, we should treat pets as a part of our families owing to the fact that this attitude has a positive effect on human's health. In fact, creation of such deep relationships between a cat, a dog or any other pet may dramatically improve health condition of the owner, in particular when we have a deal with senior citizens and elderly who feel abandoned.
In conclusion, although at the first glance it seems unreanable to treat animals as a member of a family, more attentive look at the issue reveals that we ought to treat our pets as family members because of many subjective and objective reasons.
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Comments
Hello.
Hello.
May you give me a suggestion how I can improve my essays? I need to acquire at least 26 in writing section.
I see that i have problems with spelling and I need to use more words to have at least 200 different words.
But what can I do else? What is the difference between essays which are scored 27 and 24? I have read several decent essays I cannot unfortunately figure out the distinction. Is it elaborate grammar or thoughtful context?
Thank you. Thank you for you patience.
I hope that your advice will help me.
p.s. I carefully read your suggestions, I remember that I need to polish my writing but I want to feel or comprehend the difference between good and very good answers.
Eugene.
We may not figure out exactly
We may not figure out exactly what is the difference between 24 to 27, but a trained computer - essay E-rater can.
To reach 26 or over, first of all, you will need to remove all grammar and spelling errors. This is the basic.
Second, need more difficult words. We are expecting:
No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Third, look at this:
Average Word Length: 4.4 4.6
it is low. Need better vocabulary words. and try to use less pronouns (like 'It, I, They, We, You...') as the subject of a sentence.
Fourth, remove those phrases which are not necessary:
I can see
I profoundly believe
it is widely believed that
In fact, I surmise that
I can speak
....
-----------------
read TOEFL essays by this user:
http://www.testbig.com/users/ftn
It may give more ideas.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Sentence: This happy animal which was initially treated without respect from other members of family has gain it when it protected me from other dogs which attacked me.
Description: A verb 'to have', present tense, 3rd person singular is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to has and gain
Sentence: In fact, I surmise that each individual who has even owned a pet will agree with the statement that a pet has inevitably become a friend and a part of familiy.
Error: familiy Suggestion: family
Sentence: I can speak from my own expereince.
Error: expereince Suggestion: experience
Sentence: In my childhood when I lived on a farm, we had many domisticated animals and I was allowed to have my own dog.
Error: domisticated Suggestion: domesticated
Sentence: In conclusion, although at the first glance it seems unreanable to treat animals as a member of a family, more attentive look at the issue reveals that we ought to treat our pets as family members because of many subjective and objective reasons.
Error: unreanable Suggestion: unreliable
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 24 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 365 350
No. of Characters: 1606 1500
No. of Different Words: 182 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.371 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.4 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.478 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 101 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 78 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 43 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 27 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.333 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 12.354 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.6 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.327 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.561 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.141 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5