Milk and dairy products are rich in vitamin D and calcium—substances essential for building and maintaining bones. Many people therefore say that a diet rich in dairy products can help prevent osteoporosis, a disease that is linked to both environmental and genetic factors and that causes the bones to weaken significantly with age. But a long-term study of a large number of people found that those who consistently consumed dairy products throughout the years of the study have a higher rate of bone fractures than any other participants in the study. Since bone fractures are symptomatic of osteoporosis, this study result shows that a diet rich in dairy products may actually increase, rather than decrease, the risk of osteoporosis.
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The author of the argument purportedly highlights that use of dairy products could resulted in bone fractures so-called osteoporosis. However, the premises upon which he puts his claim are fallacious. For the support of which more well-established evidence should be given.
To commence with, the author contends that vitamin D and calcium in dairy products are two of utmost important vitamin in order to prevent bone diseases. However, it does not lend credence to the argument since, there is no sufficient evidence to support if osteoporosis could be treat just by vitamin D and calcium. One point that should be considered is that every disease could have variety reasons and in order to cure them many thing is needed such as medicine, relaxation and so forth. Indeed, although vitamin D and calcium play an important role in bone fractures disease, they are not the only way to cure this disease. As a matter of fact, the author does not show to the extent people cure themselves by these vitamins. It is also important to say that these vitamins only protect bones for a short while and do not have a long lasting effect.
The author also highlights that environmental and genetic problems lead to this disease and increase vigorously with age. Although it might seems tenable at face, it has some defects. Due to the paucity of evidence that would consolidate the premise the otherwise. One of the main, if not the only, problem with the premise is that there are not any records by scholars to show that environment and genetic play a key role in osteoporosis. Indeed, many people nowadays are leading a sedentary lifestyle without any activity or doing exercise. So, this situation could enhance the likelihood of bone fractures rather than genetic or environment owing to the fact that with doing exercise and sport we could stay healthy. Alongside that, the author does not mention which age among people face this disease. In fact, bone fractures is a prevailing issue among elders that is not too odd.
Finally, as set forth by the author according to a long term study of myriads of people who use dairy products regularly in their meals, bone fractures increase among these people rather than other who do not use consistently. Nevertheless, the rationale behind this premise could be challenged owing to an insufficient evidence to support if people in this study had same age. One point that should not go unnoticed is that the author does not mention any information about age and maybe people who have participated in this research had been too old and suffered from this disease. In such case, the result could not be reliable and accurate.
Having scrutinized the premises, a logical conclusion that can be drawn is that there is some evidence, having been ignored by the author while the presence of which could add to the logic of each premise.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 84, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'could' requires the base form of the verb: 'result'
Suggestion: result
...lights that use of dairy products could resulted in bone fractures so-called osteoporosi...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 429, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun thing seems to be countable; consider using: 'many things'.
Suggestion: many things
...riety reasons and in order to cure them many thing is needed such as medicine, relaxation ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 374, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: 'aged'.
Suggestion: aged
...upport if people in this study had same age. One point that should not go unnoticed...
^^^
Line 9, column 207, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...could add to the logic of each premise.
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, finally, however, if, may, nevertheless, so, well, while, in fact, such as, as a matter of fact
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 19.6327345309 117% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 11.1786427146 134% => OK
Relative clauses : 23.0 13.6137724551 169% => OK
Pronoun: 38.0 28.8173652695 132% => OK
Preposition: 59.0 55.5748502994 106% => OK
Nominalization: 18.0 16.3942115768 110% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2397.0 2260.96107784 106% => OK
No of words: 487.0 441.139720559 110% => OK
Chars per words: 4.92197125257 5.12650576532 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.69766713281 4.56307096286 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.64286283662 2.78398813304 95% => OK
Unique words: 227.0 204.123752495 111% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.466119096509 0.468620217663 99% => OK
syllable_count: 767.7 705.55239521 109% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Interrogative: 0.0 0.471057884232 0% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 19.7664670659 111% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 49.745883172 57.8364921388 86% => OK
Chars per sentence: 108.954545455 119.503703932 91% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.1363636364 23.324526521 95% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.59090909091 5.70786347227 80% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 8.20758483034 158% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.133814628253 0.218282227539 61% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0402333477761 0.0743258471296 54% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0481849725636 0.0701772020484 69% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0759479987473 0.128457276422 59% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0458219714484 0.0628817314937 73% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.8 14.3799401198 89% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 48.3550499002 102% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.197005988 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.26 12.5979740519 89% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.1 8.32208582834 97% => OK
difficult_words: 104.0 98.500998004 106% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 12.3882235529 65% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.