tpo indpendent 21
Some people think that strengthen the relationship between them and others coworkers in the job is the main way for success. They think that way because it is easy for them to be talkative people than to work hard. Although I understand their point of view I have a different opinion, I believe that studying hard in school or college is the main way for success in our future job, because in college or school we gain the basic knowledge to start a successful job. And college or school we are facing many problems that help us to be more stronger and successful.
First of all, in school we study many subject. We decided after that what main career we would like to study. We choose our career. We decided what college we would like to continue. For example, when I was in high school I studied math, science, English, biology, chemistry, all this subjects. After high school I decided to continue studying in a pharmacy school. So my major now is science. In school I studied the basic science which helped me to move on to higher stage which is pharmacy school. In pharmacy school, I started with 101 level of chemistry which is a basic one. Then move on to higher level and so on till I graduated from pharmacy school. In pharmacy school I got the opportunity to studied basic information that prepares me for my future job. I become successful in my work because I had the gained that information from school. When a custom come to the pharmacy and asked me about the side effect of the drug or the use or even the interaction for sure I know that I have a punch of information that help him. That is why I believe that studying in college is the main way for successful future job.
Second, in college students like me are facing many problems. For example, in college student are able to interact with each others, there are bad students and good students and your responsibilities is to choose the good one and work with them. it is hard for many students to make the decisions. For example, it is the first time for them to be away from the parent. Their parent used to do every thing for them. Now students have to depend on them selves on every single step. Take me as an example when first I moved to live by my self, it was hard. I had to find an apartment. I had to find some one to live with me to share the rent with me. the one that I have to find should be a good person. All that problems that students facing help them to be stronger. After graduation student will be able to have a successful job because they used to solve their own problem in school. they used to deal with many kinds of people. That is why I think that working hard by your self not depend on people relation ship will help to have a successful future job.
In conclusion, for the reason I mention before, I believed that working hard is the best way be successful in your future life. It is also important to have a good relation ship with other people and with your coworker. But that will not help be to succeed in your work.
- tpo integrated 41 65
- TPO-03 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?It is more important to keep your old friends than it is to make new friends.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. 70
- TPO INTEDRTED 49 73
- living in alarge city or a small town. 60
- building new factory 60
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 532, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...are facing many problems that help us to be more stronger and successful. Firs...
^^
Line 1, column 537, Rule ID: MOST_COMPARATIVE[2]
Message: Use only 'stronger' (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
Suggestion: stronger
...acing many problems that help us to be more stronger and successful. First of all, in sch...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 34, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun subject seems to be countable; consider using: 'many subjects'.
Suggestion: many subjects
...ul. First of all, in school we study many subject. We decided after that what main career...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 133, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...ld like to study. We choose our career. We decided what college we would like to c...
^^
Line 3, column 296, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “After” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
... biology, chemistry, all this subjects. After high school I decided to continue study...
^^^^^
Line 6, column 247, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...choose the good one and work with them. it is hard for many students to make the d...
^^
Line 6, column 447, Rule ID: THEM_SELVES[1]
Message: Did you mean 'themselves'?
Suggestion: themselves
...or them. Now students have to depend on them selves on every single step. Take me as an exa...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 597, Rule ID: ANY_BODY[1]
Message: Did you mean 'someone'?
Suggestion: someone
...had to find an apartment. I had to find some one to live with me to share the rent with ...
^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 683, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...h me. the one that I have to find should be a good person. All that problems tha...
^^
Line 6, column 888, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: They
...d to solve their own problem in school. they used to deal with many kinds of people....
^^^^
Line 9, column 272, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ll not help be to succeed in your work.
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, second, so, then, for example, i think, in conclusion, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 15.1003584229 185% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 13.8261648746 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 24.0 11.0286738351 218% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 87.0 43.0788530466 202% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 84.0 52.1666666667 161% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.0752688172 136% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2470.0 1977.66487455 125% => OK
No of words: 567.0 407.700716846 139% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.35626102293 4.8611393121 90% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.87972968509 4.48103885553 109% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.38761104311 2.67179642975 89% => OK
Unique words: 214.0 212.727598566 101% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.377425044092 0.524837075471 72% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 767.7 618.680645161 124% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 18.0 9.59856630824 188% => OK
Interrogative: 2.0 0.994623655914 201% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.94265232975 182% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 35.0 20.6003584229 170% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 20.1344086022 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 47.0791257526 48.9658058833 96% => OK
Chars per sentence: 70.5714285714 100.406767564 70% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.2 20.6045352989 79% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.54285714286 5.45110844103 47% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 11.0 5.5376344086 199% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 19.0 11.8709677419 160% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 13.0 4.88709677419 266% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0 0.236089414692 0% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0 0.076458572812 0% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0737576698707 0% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0 0.150856017488 0% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0645574589148 0% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 7.2 11.7677419355 61% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 72.16 58.1214874552 124% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.2 10.1575268817 71% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 7.71 10.9000537634 71% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.41 8.01818996416 80% => OK
difficult_words: 71.0 86.8835125448 82% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 10.002688172 130% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 10.0537634409 84% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.
Rates: 3.33333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.