The following appeared in the summary of a study on headaches suffered by the residents of Mentia.
"Salicylates are members of the same chemical family as aspirin, a medicine used to treat headaches. Although many foods are naturally rich in salicylates, for the past several decades, food-processing companies have also been adding salicylates to foods as preservatives. This rise in the commercial use of salicylates has been found to correlate with a steady decline in the average number of headaches reported by participants in our twenty-year study. Recently, food-processing companies have found that salicylates can also be used as flavor additives for foods. With this new use for salicylates, we can expect a continued steady decline in the number of headaches suffered by the average citizen of Mentia."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The study's claim that salicylates and their increased presence in commercially available food can contribute to a decline in the number of headaches suffered by the average citizen of Mentia. The conclusion is arrived at by some simplistic deductions which need to be substantiated by sound evidence for the argument to hold veracity.
Firstly, even though salicylates belong to the same chemical group as aspirin we are not provided an evidence regarding the similarity of both substances regarding the effect they have on headaches. Belonging to the same chemical group is not enough evidence to confirm that salicylates are as effective or even similar in its effects on headaches like aspirin. Any strong evidence confirming the effects of both these substances can strengthen the argument.
Further, the argument establishes a correlation between the commercial use of salicylates and decline in the average headaches reported. But the condition of correlation is not enough as it does not confirm causality. There can be other variables like frequent exercise, stronger medication, cleaner atmosphere which could have contributed to the decline in reported headaches. If there is any evidence suggesting salicylates have directly influenced a decrease in headache, independent of all other influencing variables, then the argument will gain more traction.
After it has been duly established that salicylates really do have a positive effect on headaches as suggested, we still need strong evidence about whether using salicylates in food additives will lead to a further decline in headaches. We need information on whether the amount of salicylates being used is enough to really be effective in case of headaches; is the dosage used while cooking is similar to a medical dose of aspirin being used. Additionally, how many people are actually consuming the food items to which salicylates has been added. In case most of the population is not even purchasing these food items, then the consumption of the substance will obviously be less. Hence, the estimated decline in headaches might never be witnessed.
The argument presented in itself lacks sufficient data to be taken seriously. Additional information regarding various aspects as discussed above will help in determining concretely whether this argument holds true or not.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
argument 1 -- not OK. It is a fact, we don't need to argue.
argument 2 -- OK
argument 3 -- OK, but partly
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Let's analyze the structure of the statement and argue accordingly:
condition 1:
This rise in the commercial use of salicylates has been found to correlate with a steady decline in the average number of headaches reported by participants in our twenty-year study. //your argument 2
condition 2:
Recently, food-processing companies have found that salicylates can also be used as flavor additives for foods.//maybe people don't like the taste
conclusion:
With this new use for salicylates, we can expect a continued steady decline in the number of headaches suffered by the average citizen of Mentia. //suppose it can help cure headaches, but doesn't mean it can prevent the happening of headaches. so the number may still keep the same.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 2 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 363 350
No. of Characters: 1946 1500
No. of Different Words: 185 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.365 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.361 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.977 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 150 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 133 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 102 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 73 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.688 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.259 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.562 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.338 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.592 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.111 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, but, first, firstly, hence, if, really, regarding, so, still, then, while
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 19.6327345309 107% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.9520958084 93% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 11.1786427146 45% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 6.0 13.6137724551 44% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 15.0 28.8173652695 52% => OK
Preposition: 54.0 55.5748502994 97% => OK
Nominalization: 23.0 16.3942115768 140% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1988.0 2260.96107784 88% => OK
No of words: 363.0 441.139720559 82% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.47658402204 5.12650576532 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.3649236973 4.56307096286 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.04199098331 2.78398813304 109% => OK
Unique words: 189.0 204.123752495 93% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.520661157025 0.468620217663 111% => OK
syllable_count: 653.4 705.55239521 93% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.8 1.59920159681 113% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 5.0 8.76447105788 57% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 19.7664670659 81% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 49.0847083494 57.8364921388 85% => OK
Chars per sentence: 124.25 119.503703932 104% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.6875 23.324526521 97% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.1875 5.70786347227 91% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.25449101796 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.174565392946 0.218282227539 80% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0590617974102 0.0743258471296 79% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0563790998565 0.0701772020484 80% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0904250751874 0.128457276422 70% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0531945138518 0.0628817314937 85% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.7 14.3799401198 109% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 32.22 48.3550499002 67% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.2 12.197005988 116% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.8 12.5979740519 117% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.99 8.32208582834 108% => OK
difficult_words: 98.0 98.500998004 99% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 12.3882235529 117% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 11.9071856287 126% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 83.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.