Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea?
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Getting good grades has always been a prominent, since it demonstrates students' performance and the amount of time they studied. Although some parents agree with rewarding their children in order to encourage them to study, others disagree and they mention its detrimental impacts. In my perspective, I firmly believe that, offering financial reward to children due to their high mark at school is not a good idea. In what follows, I will explain my reasons and examples to support my view point.
The first important point should be mentioned is that, studying is definite responsibility of students and they do not have other duties except doing their assignments and prepare themselves completely for exams. Parents should not use the method of rewarding especially financial one for each great marks their children receive at school, that is their absolute duties. It is possible that they become conditional to these rewards and study just in case their parents give them money. A prime example from my own experience will illustrate my reason, when I studied at first grade of elementary school my mother gave me money for each good grade I received after a while I got used to this kind of reward and one day I asked her money because of my great mark at one difficult exam. That day my mom stopped to rewarding me in that way. She mentioned me this reward was for motivating me to get used to study and now it seems I done. If she didn't stop rewarding me I became conditional to study for receiving money not because of learning.
Furthermore, financial rewards have also harmful future outcomes, it increases the expectations level of children or even makes them rebellious people in society. After a while, they would like to receive much more money according to the difficulty of exams and lessons. For instance, one of my friends at primary school received money as much as the exams were difficult and after a while she felt all the exams are difficult and asked her parents more and more money and as she faced with their rejection she turned to become rebellious and even intimidate their parents she will quit the home! Therefore, with offering money to children because of their high mark we make them abnormal people that we do not control them.
To sum up, according to the all aforementioned reasons, I strongly disagree with financial rewarding of children for their great performance at school since, not only does it makes them conditional, but it also foster children who are against with their parents.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 941, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: didn't
...o study and now it seems I done. If she didnt stop rewarding me I became conditional ...
^^^^^
Line 4, column 176, Rule ID: DOES_NP_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'make'?
Suggestion: make
...mance at school since, not only does it makes them conditional, but it also foster ch...
^^^^^
Line 4, column 176, Rule ID: DOES_X_HAS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'make'? As 'do' is already inflected, the verb cannot also be inflected.
Suggestion: make
...mance at school since, not only does it makes them conditional, but it also foster ch...
^^^^^
Line 4, column 212, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'fosters'?
Suggestion: fosters
... it makes them conditional, but it also foster children who are against with their par...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, furthermore, if, so, therefore, while, as for, for instance, kind of, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 15.1003584229 73% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 13.8261648746 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 73.0 43.0788530466 169% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 56.0 52.1666666667 107% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2102.0 1977.66487455 106% => OK
No of words: 431.0 407.700716846 106% => OK
Chars per words: 4.87703016241 4.8611393121 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.55637350225 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.64284113332 2.67179642975 99% => OK
Unique words: 210.0 212.727598566 99% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.487238979118 0.524837075471 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 657.9 618.680645161 106% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 9.59856630824 94% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 20.6003584229 73% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 28.0 20.1344086022 139% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 99.5842468577 48.9658058833 203% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 140.133333333 100.406767564 140% => OK
Words per sentence: 28.7333333333 20.6045352989 139% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.46666666667 5.45110844103 119% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.88709677419 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.329245112146 0.236089414692 139% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.114399533328 0.076458572812 150% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.071056197543 0.0737576698707 96% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.205585581266 0.150856017488 136% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0688605735021 0.0645574589148 107% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.9 11.7677419355 135% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 51.52 58.1214874552 89% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.0 10.1575268817 128% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.62 10.9000537634 107% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.18 8.01818996416 102% => OK
difficult_words: 86.0 86.8835125448 99% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 10.002688172 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.2 10.0537634409 131% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.247311828 127% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.