some people think that young people should live alone, others do not agree with this,What do you think?

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some people think that young people should live alone, others do not agree with this,What do you think?

Although young people want independence from their parents y believe that living with them help me a lot. Parents can support students during their studies time. Besides, young people behavior would be more influenced by their parents’ way of thinking.

Parents can support their adolescents during their studies time. Students won’t have to look for any part time job and they will be more focus in a school. Working for some could be a distraction. Students could feel tired and pressured by their job. My friend had to work while she was at college. Consequently, she couldn’t attend some professor reviews, and she couldn’t participate in all the study groups sections either. Moreover, when students live with their parents they could finish the university studies faster. My brother couldn’t finish his university as faster as I since nowadays my family is facing a difficult economic situation. He had to interrupt a year and look for a job. I graduated from the university in only five years while he spends six years.

Additionally, I believe that young people could be influenced by their parent’s way of thinking while living together. My family influenced me in a very positive way. I have some friends that had a very disorganized lives since they live alone. My parents always guide me in how to manage my budget and they help me to build my credit too. My father always explained me that paying on time and having just the right amount of credit cards will help me to be a trustful person. He explained me how positive would be to my future.

To sum up parents help a very positive way their young children. My family always helps me and supports me during my studies time and they also influenced my behavior.

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2013-07-25 nar78 65 view
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Sentence: Besides, young people behavior would be more influenced by their parents' way of thinking.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: people's behavior

Sentence: Consequently, she couldn't attend some professor reviews, and she couldn't participate in all the study groups sections either.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to groups and sections

Sentence: To sum up parents help a very positive way their young children.
Description: A noun, singular, common is not usually followed by a determiner, possessive
Suggestion: Refer to way and their

flaws:
No. of Different Words: 145 200
Avg. Sentence Length: 14.381 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.122 7.5

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 19 in 30
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 302 350
No. of Characters: 1397 1500
No. of Different Words: 145 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.169 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.626 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.49 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 102 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 64 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 43 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 22 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 14.381 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.122 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.476 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.332 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.481 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.135 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5