Decision making is an important part of our lives. Our decisions often cause different consequences in the future, that’s why it is so important to choose the right. Some people believe that young people have no influence on the important decision that determines the future of the society; others disagree. Even though some people might find the influence of young people because they are more active in political life by establishing new political organizations or by fighting during demonstrations. In my view, young people have no influence on the important decision for two important reasons.
The main reason is that they are not the majority. In all well-developed countries, the majority are senior citizens. And when a community has to make a decision a young people don’t have enough votes to support their view. For example, two years ago, in my hometown, Kharkiv citizen had an option between building new park or lowering the tax rates. The senior citizen supported the idea about the construction of the park because it would provide for them good place for relaxing and enjoy the nature. The young people, on the other hand, wanted to lower taxes because it would be beneficial for small business and would attract more international companies and investments, as a result, it would have provided more job opportunities and increased the wealth of citizen dramatically. Because the majority wanted park the second proposal was denied even though it would provide more benefits. As you can see, young people can’t influence because they are not the majority.
Another important reason is that young people don’t have enough political power. In all countries, the government consists primarly from older people, who are usually older than 45 years. For instance, in my country, the parliament consists of 450 representatives and only twelve of them are younger than thirty-five years. This tiny amount of people couldn’t oppose others, as a result, it is hard for them to influence on an important decision. Also, they influenced by older and became more corrupted. Older people could manipulate them in order to get more vote. As you can see, young people don’t have enough political power and just became the tool of older governors.
In conclusion, young people don’t influence on important decisions. Not only because they don’t have enough political power, but also because they are not the majority of the society.
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- TPO-34 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?Educating children is a more difficult task today than it was in the past because they spend so much time on cell phone, online games, and social networking Web site.U 70
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 257, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... their view. For example, two years ago, in my hometown, Kharkiv citizen had an o...
^^
Line 7, column 195, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ey are not the majority of the society.
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, if, second, so, well, as to, for example, for instance, in conclusion, as a result, in my view, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 15.1003584229 93% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 9.8082437276 102% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 13.8261648746 80% => OK
Relative clauses : 6.0 11.0286738351 54% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 29.0 43.0788530466 67% => OK
Preposition: 37.0 52.1666666667 71% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 8.0752688172 124% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2088.0 1977.66487455 106% => OK
No of words: 397.0 407.700716846 97% => OK
Chars per words: 5.25944584383 4.8611393121 108% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.46372701284 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.82800312231 2.67179642975 106% => OK
Unique words: 189.0 212.727598566 89% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.476070528967 0.524837075471 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 658.8 618.680645161 106% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.51630824373 112% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 9.59856630824 52% => OK
Article: 6.0 3.08781362007 194% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.6003584229 107% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 51.1428884726 48.9658058833 104% => OK
Chars per sentence: 94.9090909091 100.406767564 95% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.0454545455 20.6045352989 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.63636363636 5.45110844103 103% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 11.8709677419 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.88709677419 184% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.199406391002 0.236089414692 84% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0761637827931 0.076458572812 100% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0789854746291 0.0737576698707 107% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.137498336007 0.150856017488 91% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0705208883132 0.0645574589148 109% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.4 11.7677419355 105% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 44.75 58.1214874552 77% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 10.1575268817 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.93 10.9000537634 119% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.03 8.01818996416 100% => OK
difficult_words: 88.0 86.8835125448 101% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.