The following appeared in a memorandum from the owner of Movies Galore, a chain of video rental stores.“In order to reverse the recent decline in our profits, we must reduce operating expenses at Movies Galore’s ten video rental stores. Since we are f

Essay topics:

The following appeared in a memorandum from the owner of Movies Galore, a chain of video rental stores.

“In order to reverse the recent decline in our profits, we must reduce operating expenses at Movies Galore’s ten video rental stores. Since we are famous for our special bargains, raising our rental prices is not a viable way to improve profits Last month our store in downtown Marston significantly decreased its operating expenses by closing at 6:00 PM rather than 9:00 PM and by reducing its stock by eliminating all movies released more than five years ago. Therefore, in order to increase profits without jeopardizing our reputation for offering great movies at low prices, we recommend implementing similar changes in our other nine Movies Galore stores”.

Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be addressed in order to decide whether implementing the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result and explain how the answers to those questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.

In this memorandum the owner of Movies Galore suggests that by initiating a chain-wide change in inventory and hours of operation that worked for one specific store, the entire chain will benfit by following the same practices. There are many problems with this sentimate that will untimately need to be addressed.

First, the owner states that raising rental prices is not a viable way to imporve profits based upon the reputation of Movies Galore. However, the owner does not consider that the “famous bargains” might be much lower than the nearest competitor, leaving room for an increase that might still make Movies Galore the most bargain-worthy rental store. Additionally, the owner does not take into account that a shift in types of special bargains might appeal to renters. For example, if overall prices are raised but loyalty programs are instituted, this might increase renter frequency in order to achieve the “bargain” promised after a certain loyalty action is complete (such as the rental of five movies, etc.).

Second, the owner states that the downtown store reduced its hours and eliminated the stock of movies that had been released more than five years ago, thereby eliminating a portion of operating costs. What the owner fails to take into account is the demographics of this location. Historically, shoppers in different areas have different preferences and tollerances. Marketing and business professionals utilize this demographic information to suggest best practices for organizations as the data might suggest a deviation from the standard say, store hours. In short, what worked for one store will not always work for another store if the results were more an endproduct of the demographic than standard practice.

Finally, the owner fails to evaluate other factors such as number of employees, scheduling , and pay. A disorganized or redundant employee schedule can increase operating costs by allowing for more than one person to be paid to do the same job when only one employee is required at a particular time. Further, if superflous staff is generally on-shift, this would also increase opperating costs regularly.

To conclude, in order to agree to implement the suggested changes more research needs to be completed. As discussed, the owner needs to address; (a) whether or not alternative options are available, such as altering the video rental prices in a manner that still appeals to customers, (b) if the results achieved at the downtown store were a mere factor of location and shopper demographics, and lastly, (c) if staffing issues could be a factor in the imbalalance of operating costs to profit. Only after exploring these options would it be possible to determine if the proposed changes would precipitate the desired result.

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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 729, Rule ID: DOUBLE_PUNCTUATION
Message: Two consecutive dots
Suggestion: .
...e such as the rental of five movies, etc.. Second, the owner states that the d...
^^
Line 7, column 91, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
... such as number of employees, scheduling , and pay. A disorganized or redundant em...
^^
Line 9, column 148, Rule ID: WHETHER[7]
Message: Perhaps you can shorten this phrase to just 'whether'. It is correct though if you mean 'regardless of whether'.
Suggestion: whether
...iscussed, the owner needs to address; a whether or not alternative options are available, such...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 283, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... manner that still appeals to customers, b if the results achieved at the downtow...
^^
Line 10, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...would precipitate the desired result.
^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, however, if, lastly, second, so, still, for example, in short, such as

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.6327345309 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 11.1786427146 89% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 19.0 28.8173652695 66% => OK
Preposition: 51.0 55.5748502994 92% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 16.3942115768 55% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2360.0 2260.96107784 104% => OK
No of words: 446.0 441.139720559 101% => OK
Chars per words: 5.29147982063 5.12650576532 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.5955099915 4.56307096286 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.90888308957 2.78398813304 104% => OK
Unique words: 241.0 204.123752495 118% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.540358744395 0.468620217663 115% => OK
syllable_count: 742.5 705.55239521 105% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 19.7664670659 86% => OK
Sentence length: 26.0 22.8473053892 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 77.7598111835 57.8364921388 134% => OK
Chars per sentence: 138.823529412 119.503703932 116% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.2352941176 23.324526521 112% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.70588235294 5.70786347227 100% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.25449101796 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.168703653642 0.218282227539 77% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0489800375464 0.0743258471296 66% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0529199052121 0.0701772020484 75% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0885702567777 0.128457276422 69% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0517259832788 0.0628817314937 82% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.6 14.3799401198 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 36.63 48.3550499002 76% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.1628742515 156% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.6 12.197005988 120% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.7 12.5979740519 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.78 8.32208582834 118% => OK
difficult_words: 137.0 98.500998004 139% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 15.0 12.3882235529 121% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 11.1389221557 111% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 11.9071856287 126% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------

Rates: 83.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Sentence: In this memorandum the owner of Movies Galore suggests that by initiating a chain-wide change in inventory and hours of operation that worked for one specific store, the entire chain will benfit by following the same practices.
Error: chain-wide Suggestion: chain wide
Error: benfit Suggestion: benefit

Sentence: There are many problems with this sentimate that will untimately need to be addressed.
Error: sentimate Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: untimately Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: First, the owner states that raising rental prices is not a viable way to imporve profits based upon the reputation of Movies Galore.
Error: imporve Suggestion: improve

Sentence: Historically, shoppers in different areas have different preferences and tollerances.
Error: tollerances Suggestion: tolerances

Sentence: In short, what worked for one store will not always work for another store if the results were more an endproduct of the demographic than standard practice.
Error: endproduct Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: Further, if superflous staff is generally on-shift, this would also increase opperating costs regularly.
Error: opperating Suggestion: operating
Error: superflous Suggestion: superfluous
Error: on-shift Suggestion: shift

Sentence: As discussed, the owner needs to address; a whether or not alternative options are available, such as altering the video rental prices in a manner that still appeals to customers, b if the results achieved at the downtown store were a mere factor of location and shopper demographics, and lastly, c if staffing issues could be a factor in the imbalalance of operating costs to profit.
Error: imbalalance Suggestion: imbalance

---------------
argument 1 -- OK

argument 2 -- OK

argument 3 -- not OK. need to argue:

Therefore, in order to increase profits without jeopardizing our reputation for offering great movies at low prices, we recommend implementing similar changes in our other nine Movies Galore stores”.
----------------

Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 10 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 446 350
No. of Characters: 2273 1500
No. of Different Words: 238 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.596 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.096 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.701 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 171 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 132 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 94 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 57 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26.235 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 13.362 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.529 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.303 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.555 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.047 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5