The following appeared in a memorandum written by the vice president of Health Naturally, a small but expanding chain of stores selling health food and other health-related products.
"Our previous experience has been that our stores are most profitable in areas where residents are highly concerned with leading healthy lives. We should therefore build one of our new stores in Plainsville, which clearly has many such residents. Plainsville merchants report that sales of running shoes and exercise equipment are at all-time highs. The local health club, which nearly closed five years ago due to lack of business, has more members than ever, and the weight-training and aerobics classes are always full. We can even anticipate a new generation of customers: Plainsville's schoolchildren are required to participate in a program called Fitness for Life, which emphasizes the benefits of regular exercise at an early age."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
The vice president of a small but expanding business tries to find better place for a new store. He or she supposes that the best place for it is Plainsville town, there most of people lead a healthy life style. It could be quite true that this town may bring a great profit for this company, however, at the same time, it is not so obvious and clear, because of the argumentation of the passage. After a brief consideration, it becomes clear that it bases on assumptions that could be easily false. Hence, in order to be sure about this place, the the vice president should examine them properly.
The first assumption is about information that should strengthen the arugumentation, however, it creates more questions than certainty. The author of the text states that Plainsville merchants have the all time high sales of running shoes and sport equipment. Hence, the assumption is that such high sales will last quite long. However, it could be easily seasonal sales. For example, the most part of merchants made a great discount for these products before a new collection, and it is the main reason of the high sales. However, it does not state that the town has a stable demand for such products.
The second assumption is subject to the same logic. It states that a local gym club is full. It is not so persuasive argument in this case, because, it states only about one gym club. It could be a lot of reasons why it is full for this moment. For example, a lot of young men try to gain a good fit before summer. However, it never lasts long.
The third assumption is about the stable demand for healty products in the future. The author thinks that the new fitness program which was implemented in schools will create the new generation who will be thier future customers. There is no doubt that such forecast is too brave to base on it own business plan. The schoolchildren may easily reject this program. Consequently, this argument is not relevant at all.
To sum up, the author made not the best try to persuade the readers that the best place is Plainsville, because he or she bases the arugmentation on flabby and shaky assumptions, which could be easily false. Before making such crucial decision, the author should check these arguments once again. Otherwise, he or she seriously ventures to have low profitable business in this town.
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- When Stanley Park first opened, it was the largest, most heavily used public park in town. It is still the largest park, but it is no longer heavily used. Video cameras mounted in the park's parking lots last month revealed the park's drop in popularity: 62
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Sentence: The third assumption is about the stable demand for healty products in the future.
Error: healty Suggestion: health
Sentence: The author thinks that the new fitness program which was implemented in schools will create the new generation who will be thier future customers.
Error: thier Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: To sum up, the author made not the best try to persuade the readers that the best place is Plainsville, because he or she bases the arugmentation on flabby and shaky assumptions, which could be easily false.
Error: arugmentation Suggestion: argumentation
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argument 1 -- not OK. it is 'are at all-time highs'.
suggested:
Maybe Plainsville is located at a hilly or rainy area.
argument 2 -- not exactly. it didn't mention the time. Better to say: how is the size of the club and how many clubs and their conditions in Plainsville.
argument 3 -- not exactly. it is wrong because it is trying to connect fitness programs to selling health food and other health-related products.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 2.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
No. of Sentences: 25 15
No. of Words: 413 350
No. of Characters: 1882 1500
No. of Different Words: 195 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.508 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.557 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.481 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 113 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 77 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 51 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 34 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.52 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.9 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.68 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.262 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.471 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.084 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
The vice president of a small but expand...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 178, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'most of', you should use 'the' ('most of the people') or simply say ''most people''.
Suggestion: most of the people; most people
...place for it is Plainsville town, there most of people lead a healthy life style. It could be...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 554, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: the
..., in order to be sure about this place, the the vice president should examine them prop...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 554, Rule ID: DT_DT[1]
Message: Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only 'the' or 'the' is left.
Suggestion: the; the
..., in order to be sure about this place, the the vice president should examine them prop...
^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...esident should examine them properly. The first assumption is about i...
^^^
Line 3, column 192, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...thor of the text states that Plainsville merchants have the all time high sales o...
^^
Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...as a stable demand for such products. The second assumption is subje...
^^^
Line 5, column 195, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...use, it states only about one gym club. It could be a lot of reasons why it is ful...
^^
Discourse Markers used:
['but', 'consequently', 'first', 'hence', 'however', 'if', 'may', 'second', 'so', 'then', 'third', 'for example', 'no doubt', 'to sum up']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.222462203024 0.25644967241 87% => OK
Verbs: 0.11879049676 0.15541462614 76% => OK
Adjectives: 0.120950323974 0.0836205057962 145% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0626349892009 0.0520304965353 120% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0496760259179 0.0272364105082 182% => Less pronouns wanted. Try not to use 'you, I, they, he...' as the subject of a sentence
Prepositions: 0.110151187905 0.125424944231 88% => OK
Participles: 0.0107991360691 0.0416121511921 26% => Some participles wanted.
Conjunctions: 2.59640722691 2.79052419416 93% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0172786177106 0.026700313972 65% => OK
Particles: 0.00215982721382 0.001811407834 119% => OK
Determiners: 0.123110151188 0.113004496875 109% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0280777537797 0.0255425247493 110% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.0129589632829 0.0127820249294 101% => OK
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2393.0 2731.13054187 88% => OK
No of words: 413.0 446.07635468 93% => OK
Chars per words: 5.79418886199 6.12365571057 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.50803742585 4.57801047555 98% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.302663438257 0.378187486979 80% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.193704600484 0.287650121315 67% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.150121065375 0.208842608468 72% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.089588377724 0.135150697306 66% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.59640722691 2.79052419416 93% => OK
Unique words: 202.0 207.018472906 98% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.489104116223 0.469332199767 104% => OK
Word variations: 53.6865993852 52.1807786196 103% => OK
How many sentences: 25.0 20.039408867 125% => OK
Sentence length: 16.52 23.2022227129 71% => OK
Sentence length SD: 43.9672605469 57.7814097925 76% => OK
Chars per sentence: 95.72 141.986410481 67% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.52 23.2022227129 71% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.56 0.724660767414 77% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.14285714286 97% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 3.58251231527 223% => Correct essay format wanted or double check grammar & spelling issues after essay writing.
Readability: 35.8904600484 51.9672348444 69% => OK
Elegance: 1.48598130841 1.8405768891 81% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.212439712395 0.441005458295 48% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.107166532415 0.135418324435 79% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0901965553976 0.0829849096947 109% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.482626156438 0.58762219726 82% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.145239046783 0.147661913831 98% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0796759232088 0.193483328276 41% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0588610384353 0.0970749176394 61% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.376707471826 0.42659136922 88% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0738464626689 0.0774707102158 95% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.147884915186 0.312017818177 47% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0481388755447 0.0698173142475 69% => The ideas may be duplicated in paragraphs.
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 8.33743842365 168% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.87684729064 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.82512315271 124% => OK
Positive topic words: 10.0 6.46551724138 155% => OK
Negative topic words: 4.0 5.36822660099 75% => OK
Neutral topic words: 4.0 2.82389162562 142% => OK
Total topic words: 18.0 14.657635468 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.