An international development organization, in response to a vitamin A deficiency among people in the impoverished nation of Tagus, has engineered a new breed of millet high in vitamin A. While seeds for this new type of millet cost more, farmers will be paid subsidies for farming the new variety of millet. Since millet is already a staple food in Tagus, people will readily adopt the new variety. To combat vitamin A deficiency, the government of Tagus should do everything it can to promote this new type of millet.
The argument is based on several fallacious assumptions and fails to provide substantive evidences to justify them. Primarily, it makes the unwarranted assumption that developing a new type of costly millet will result in the reduction of the vitamin A deficiency, rendering the main conclusion, that the government should promote the millet, invalid.
First of all, the argument explicitly states that the nation of Tagus is impoverished. As the cost of the new type of millets is higher, we can safely assume that the poor farmers of the seeds will not be able to buy them on their own. Pertaining to this situation, the government will allow subsidies to the farmers. But we need to ask, will the subsidies be enough to outweigh the costs of producing the new type of millet? What if the production requires much more than the amount given? Or what would happen if the business isn't successful at all? Maybe, to combat the insecticides of the plants, the farmers would need more money that the initial cost of the seeds and they can't keep the production business going. A strongly detailed survey of the farmer's economic situation and growth system of the new type of millet is required to properly asses this situation. Even then answers concerning the popularity of the millet or the farmer's interest in producing the millet will be required.
The argument assumes that the government will be allowing subsidies to the poor farmers, but what of the penurious people of the country themselves? These people, who are the main buyers of the millet, no economic assistance is provided to them. Considering the high cost of the seeds, we can assume the the produced pills will be equally expensive if not higher. Therefore, even if the millet production is successful, there is no meaning if the buyers don't even have enough money to buy them in the first place. One might ask, are people economically stable to buy the new millets? Are they even interested in the millets? Thus several questions remains unanswered and these needs to be dealt with before further insight can be poured onto the matter.
Finally, the assumption that as people already have millets as a staple food, they will readily buy the new one is unjustified. There is no evidence that the new millet is better that the previous one. Several questions come to mind. What is the new millet lacks other vitamin nutrients and will result in another deficiency other that vitamin A? What will happen if people take such a high dose of vitamin A, will they be safe or will there be any side-effect? Thus answers concerning the nutrient balance of the new millet as well as its safety is required. Even if these questions are answered, we can never say that the pill will be readily adopted because many people dislike a change and there can a variety of reasons why the mills will not be accepted in the nation of Tagus, thus rendering the situation that vitamin A deficincy problem will be solved, improbable.
In conclusion, the argument is filled will unattended holes concerning the economic ability of the buyers, the amount of the subsidy and the acceptance of the people of the nation and until further evidence is provided to strengthen it, these assumptions severely undermine the argument presented.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Sentence: Even if these questions are answered, we can never say that the pill will be readily adopted because many people dislike a change and there can a variety of reasons why the mills will not be accepted in the nation of Tagus, thus rendering the situation that vitamin A deficincy problem will be solved, improbable.
Error: deficincy Suggestion: deficiency
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argument 1 -- OK
argument 2 -- duplicated to argument 1.
argument 3 -- not exactly. we may say: people may not like the taste.
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flaws:
Need to argue against the conclusion always. For this topic it is:
To combat vitamin A deficiency, the government of Tagus should do everything it can to promote this new type of millet.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 25 15
No. of Words: 560 350
No. of Characters: 2667 1500
No. of Different Words: 234 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.865 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.762 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.574 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 197 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 141 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 96 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 64 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.4 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 12 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.56 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.301 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.46 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.109 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 222, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...f the seeds will not be able to buy them on their own. Pertaining to this situati...
^^
Line 3, column 530, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: isn't
...n? Or what would happen if the business isnt successful at all? Maybe, to combat the...
^^^^
Line 3, column 681, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
... the initial cost of the seeds and they cant keep the production business going. A s...
^^^^
Line 5, column 293, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ering the high cost of the seeds, we can assume the the produced pills will be eq...
^^
Line 5, column 302, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: the
... high cost of the seeds, we can assume the the produced pills will be equally expensiv...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 302, Rule ID: DT_DT[1]
Message: Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only 'the' or 'the' is left.
Suggestion: the; the
... high cost of the seeds, we can assume the the produced pills will be equally expensiv...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 456, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...sful, there is no meaning if the buyers dont even have enough money to buy them in t...
^^^^
Line 5, column 627, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...re they even interested in the millets? Thus several questions remains unanswered an...
^^^^
Line 7, column 450, Rule ID: AFFECT_EFFECT[14]
Message: Did you mean 'side effect' (=adverse effect, unintended consequence)? Open compounds are not hyphenated.
Suggestion: side effect
... will they be safe or will there be any side-effect? Thus answers concerning the nutrient b...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, finally, first, if, may, so, then, therefore, thus, well, in conclusion, as well as, first of all, in the first place
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 30.0 19.6327345309 153% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 27.0 12.9520958084 208% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 13.0 11.1786427146 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 13.6137724551 95% => OK
Pronoun: 35.0 28.8173652695 121% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 61.0 55.5748502994 110% => OK
Nominalization: 23.0 16.3942115768 140% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2731.0 2260.96107784 121% => OK
No of words: 558.0 441.139720559 126% => OK
Chars per words: 4.89426523297 5.12650576532 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.86024933743 4.56307096286 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.63792282613 2.78398813304 95% => OK
Unique words: 238.0 204.123752495 117% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.426523297491 0.468620217663 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 857.7 705.55239521 122% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 4.96107784431 161% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 26.0 19.7664670659 132% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 22.8473053892 92% => OK
Sentence length SD: 67.0266771054 57.8364921388 116% => OK
Chars per sentence: 105.038461538 119.503703932 88% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.4615384615 23.324526521 92% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.69230769231 5.70786347227 82% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 9.0 5.25449101796 171% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 8.20758483034 158% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 6.88822355289 116% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.392956049449 0.218282227539 180% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.114171445903 0.0743258471296 154% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0801475298159 0.0701772020484 114% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.21577627569 0.128457276422 168% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.104487932764 0.0628817314937 166% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.3 14.3799401198 86% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 58.62 48.3550499002 121% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 12.197005988 84% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.08 12.5979740519 88% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.1 8.32208582834 97% => OK
difficult_words: 121.0 98.500998004 123% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 12.3882235529 117% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.1389221557 93% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.