As people grow older, an enzyme known as PEP increasingly breaks down the neuropeptide chemicals involved in learning and memory. But now, researchers have found compounds that prevent PEP from breaking neuropeptides apart. In tests, these compounds almost completely restored lost memory in rats. The use of these compounds should be extended to students who have poor memory and difficulty in concentrating - and therefore serious problems in school performance. Science finally has a solution for problems neither parents nor teachers could solve.
The arguer recommends administering doses of certain chemical compounds to students in order to improve their performance in school. These compounds have been found to restore lost memory in rats. Therefore, the arguer asserts that they will be able to improve the memory and concentration of students as well by preventing the PEP enzyme from breaking down the chemicals that are involved in learning and memory. Nevertheless, there are certain points that question the soundness of the recommendation made by the arguer.
Firstly, a major lacuna in the argument is the unfair analogy that has been drawn between rats and humans. It is not necessary that what has been proven to be true for rats would be true for humans also. Although, there is a possibility of having similar results when the compounds are administered to humans, the reader would like to see concrete evidence being provided in support of this claim. The argument could have been bolstered by providing evidence that proved that the compounds would have similar effects on humans and rats. In the absence of such data, the contention that the use of these compounds can resolve the issue of poor performance by students in school is highly unwarranted.
Secondly, the arguer clearly brings out that as one grows older the PEP enzyme increasingly breaks down the neuropeptide chemicals that are involved in learning and memory. There is no mention of the role that this enzyme plays in young humans. It is likely that the PEP enzyme has no effect on the learning abilities and concentration of young people. Therefore, the administration of compounds that inhibit the actions of the PEP enzyme will have little or no effect in young people because the neuropeptides in their bodies would be intact as the PEP enzyme would not be as active as it would be when they grow older. Hence, the arguer fails to justify the reason for administering these compounds to students. Moreover, there is no surety that the memory and concentration power of students would actually increase after using these compounds.
Thirdly, even if one assumes that the compounds will have similar effects on rats and humans, the arguer has completely ignored other factors that can affect the performance of a school student. The teaching standards of the school, the interest shown by the student in his studies, able guidance from parents, friend circles etc. all contribute to the problems that may exist in the school performance of a student. It is not necessary that good memory and concentration are sufficient for improving the school performance. Moreover, the experiment in rats has shown effects on their lost memory and there is no mention of the effect that these compounds have had on the concentration power of rats. Therefore, the assumption that the use of these compounds will improve the memory and concentration of the students, thereby leading to a marked improvement in their school performance is far-fetched and grossly unconvincing.
The argument could have been substantiated to a significant extent by providing concrete evidence that could have proved similarities in the effects that the compounds will have on rats and humans. Additionally, the arguer needs to convince the reader that the poor performance of students in school can be attributed to their poor memory and concentration alone. Moreover, the argument needs to include information on the role played by the PEP enzyme on young people. Therefore, lack of crucial evidence has rendered the given argument weak and unconvincing in several respects.
- As people grow older, an enzyme known as PEP increasingly breaks down the neuropeptide chemicals involved in learning and memory. But now, researchers have found compounds that prevent PEP from breaking neuropeptides apart. In tests, these compounds almos 50
- As people grow older, an enzyme known as PEP increasingly breaks down the neuropeptide chemicals involved in learning and memory. But now, researchers have found compounds that prevent PEP from breaking neuropeptides apart. In tests, these compounds almos 62
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 199, Rule ID: ALSO_SENT_END[1]
Message: 'Also' is not used at the end of the sentence. Use 'as well' instead.
Suggestion: as well
... true for rats would be true for humans also. Although, there is a possibility of ha...
^^^^
Discourse Markers used:
['actually', 'also', 'but', 'first', 'firstly', 'hence', 'if', 'may', 'moreover', 'nevertheless', 'second', 'secondly', 'so', 'therefore', 'third', 'thirdly', 'well']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.257142857143 0.25644967241 100% => OK
Verbs: 0.161904761905 0.15541462614 104% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0698412698413 0.0836205057962 84% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0428571428571 0.0520304965353 82% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0190476190476 0.0272364105082 70% => OK
Prepositions: 0.134920634921 0.125424944231 108% => OK
Participles: 0.0603174603175 0.0416121511921 145% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.86193970729 2.79052419416 103% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0238095238095 0.026700313972 89% => OK
Particles: 0.0047619047619 0.001811407834 263% => OK
Determiners: 0.125396825397 0.113004496875 111% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0301587301587 0.0255425247493 118% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.0190476190476 0.0127820249294 149% => OK
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 3598.0 2731.13054187 132% => OK
No of words: 584.0 446.07635468 131% => OK
Chars per words: 6.16095890411 6.12365571057 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.91590194646 4.57801047555 107% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.388698630137 0.378187486979 103% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.28595890411 0.287650121315 99% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.200342465753 0.208842608468 96% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.133561643836 0.135150697306 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.86193970729 2.79052419416 103% => OK
Unique words: 223.0 207.018472906 108% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.381849315068 0.469332199767 81% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
Word variations: 45.2567320646 52.1807786196 87% => OK
How many sentences: 25.0 20.039408867 125% => OK
Sentence length: 23.36 23.2022227129 101% => OK
Sentence length SD: 51.3518685152 57.7814097925 89% => OK
Chars per sentence: 143.92 141.986410481 101% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.36 23.2022227129 101% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.68 0.724660767414 94% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.14285714286 97% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 3.58251231527 28% => OK
Readability: 51.955890411 51.9672348444 100% => OK
Elegance: 2.02127659574 1.8405768891 110% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.334246921364 0.441005458295 76% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.146549498659 0.135418324435 108% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0662878716043 0.0829849096947 80% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.594455210834 0.58762219726 101% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.119430452639 0.147661913831 81% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.150854019327 0.193483328276 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0861159537568 0.0970749176394 89% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.574870496829 0.42659136922 135% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0530399038039 0.0774707102158 68% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.257926573631 0.312017818177 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0851705174313 0.0698173142475 122% => OK
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.33743842365 108% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 16.0 6.87684729064 233% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.82512315271 0% => More neutral sentences wanted.
Positive topic words: 8.0 6.46551724138 124% => OK
Negative topic words: 11.0 5.36822660099 205% => OK
Neutral topic words: 0.0 2.82389162562 0% => More neutral topic words wanted.
Total topic words: 19.0 14.657635468 130% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
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Rates: 62.5 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.75 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.