Pirouettes Ballet School is the clear choice for any child. Of all the dance schools in Elmtown, Pirouettes has the most intensive program, and our teachers have danced in the most prestigious ballet companies all over the world. Many of our students have gone on to become professional dancers with top dance companies.
The above statement states that the Pirouettes Ballet School should be a clear choice for any child as it has most intensive program with the teachers who have danced in the most prestigious ballet companies. Above statement also mentions that the students of the School has later become the professional dancer with top dance companies. I find this argument dubious because of several unwarranted assumption.
First, the school assumes that all the child are interested in learning dance. It is possible that the most of the children is not interested in dance at all and are more interested in science and other technological stuffs which has to do nothing with the dance. So telling that the Pirouettes Ballet School is clear choice for any child does not hold water. There may be other schools in the Elmtown that comprises different other courses that most of the children are interested in.
Even though, assuming that most of the children from the town are interested in the dance does not mean they are interested in the curriculum of the Pirouettes Ballet School. The statement clearly states that the school has a intensive program which could intimidate children more than encourage them. May be children prefer more flexible course than the intensive program for their dance class.
Thirdly, the statement makes a unwarranted assumption that the good dancer can be a good teacher too. It could be possible that the those teachers who have danced in the most prestigious ballet companies can teach the children perfectly. May be they are bad at teaching dance to other people and only good at doing what they are told.
To support the given argument, it must conform that the most of child of Elmtown are interested in joining the dance school and also prefer intensive program rather than a flexible one. Also, the argument must also provide additional information showing that the teachers appointed in the school are also good at teaching dance to young child.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 10 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 2 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 330 350
No. of Characters: 1621 1500
No. of Different Words: 138 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.262 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.912 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.505 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 113 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 83 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 60 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 38 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.43 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.6 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.405 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.405 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.122 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 73, Rule ID: AFFORD_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the infinitive: 'to dance'
Suggestion: to dance
...ll the child are interested in learning dance. It is possible that the most of the ch...
^^^^^
Line 2, column 283, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...hing with the dance. So telling that the Pirouettes Ballet School is clear choice...
^^
Line 3, column 224, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...ment clearly states that the school has a intensive program which could intimidat...
^
Line 4, column 30, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...ce class. Thirdly, the statement makes a unwarranted assumption that the good da...
^
Line 4, column 238, Rule ID: MAY_BE[1]
Message: Did you mean 'maybe' (=perhaps)?
Suggestion: Maybe
...anies can teach the children perfectly. May be they are bad at teaching dance to other...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, if, may, so, third, thirdly, as to
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.6327345309 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 12.9520958084 77% => OK
Conjunction : 4.0 11.1786427146 36% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 17.0 13.6137724551 125% => OK
Pronoun: 25.0 28.8173652695 87% => OK
Preposition: 33.0 55.5748502994 59% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 11.0 16.3942115768 67% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1649.0 2260.96107784 73% => OK
No of words: 330.0 441.139720559 75% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.99696969697 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.26214759535 4.56307096286 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.53505994517 2.78398813304 91% => OK
Unique words: 138.0 204.123752495 68% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.418181818182 0.468620217663 89% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 495.9 705.55239521 70% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 5.0 8.76447105788 57% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 19.7664670659 76% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 41.2017259617 57.8364921388 71% => OK
Chars per sentence: 109.933333333 119.503703932 92% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.0 23.324526521 94% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.13333333333 5.70786347227 55% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.25449101796 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 8.20758483034 146% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.67664670659 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.420553199401 0.218282227539 193% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.153931064891 0.0743258471296 207% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.125907502347 0.0701772020484 179% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.244045751434 0.128457276422 190% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0850306175301 0.0628817314937 135% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.1 14.3799401198 91% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 48.3550499002 119% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.72 12.5979740519 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.22 8.32208582834 87% => OK
difficult_words: 52.0 98.500998004 53% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.