School should do more to prepare students for the non-academic aspects of adulthood.

Essay topics:

School should do more to prepare students for the non-academic aspects of adulthood.

While a reasonable person would argue that school should take the responsibility of instructing students even out of academic curriculum, since such aspects of life skills (including how to deal with people etc.) play a very important role in real life. However, it is equally important to understand the issues of practicality and subjectivity associated with this. First of all it is challenging to decide what things/activities will be taught as a part of "non-academic" curriculum. Even if that is decided we will have to ponder upon if we really have ample instructors and resources to support this.

Let us first consider the challenge of deciding what does and what does not come under the umbrella of non-academic curriculum. For example, consider a country like India where there is a huge diversity of people. In different parts of the country people follow different religion, different culture, speak native languages and so on. Now, in such a heterogeneous society deciding what forms the non-academic curriculum is a daunting task, undoubtedly, different sections will have different preferences and demands. On the other hand, some might argue that this scenario does not hold for countries like United States of America which are more homogeneous as a society. Here too, even if society as a whole is one but individuals do have different opinions and ideologies. And so coming to a consensus is hard even for such a uniform population.

Further, even if the curriculum is somehow agreed upon; we will have to ask ourselves do we really have enough resources for this? Many countries today do not have enough teaching professionals and infrastructure even to support the basic education. For instance, consider India, the population is increasing at a rate of seven individuals per second and while the resources remain almost the same for years. And until the rate of increase in resources surpasses this the rate of growth in population the solution is not feasible for a long term.

And finally, it is also prudent to ask if children really need such a training. In my view, it is wiser to let individuals learn through their experiences in life and learn for themselves. If they are instructed about everything they might always look for a helping hand, which will make them a liability on others. This ideology is inspired from the well-known example of butterfly, which leaves its baby inside the cocoon and does not help it to break the shell. That way the baby breaks the shell by itself and is ready to survive the external environment and its hardships. Similarly, we should let children experience and provide only necessary help and not go beyond the limits.

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Average: 5 (1 vote)
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Essays by user sunnyd :

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 212, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Play
... including how to deal with people etc. play a very important role in real life. How...
^^^^
Line 1, column 397, Rule ID: ALLOW_TO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'deciding'? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'challenge' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
Suggestion: deciding
...th this. First of all it is challenging to decide what things/activities will be taught a...
^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, however, if, look, really, second, similarly, so, well, while, for example, for instance, such as, first of all, in my view, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.5258426966 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.4196629213 89% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 14.8657303371 121% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.3162921348 71% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 31.0 33.0505617978 94% => OK
Preposition: 53.0 58.6224719101 90% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 12.9106741573 62% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2262.0 2235.4752809 101% => OK
No of words: 446.0 442.535393258 101% => OK
Chars per words: 5.07174887892 5.05705443957 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.5955099915 4.55969084622 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.04798176589 2.79657885939 109% => OK
Unique words: 239.0 215.323595506 111% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.535874439462 0.4932671777 109% => OK
syllable_count: 720.0 704.065955056 102% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 6.24550561798 112% => OK
Article: 1.0 4.99550561798 20% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.10617977528 193% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.77640449438 169% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.38483146067 114% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.2370786517 109% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 23.0359550562 87% => OK
Sentence length SD: 35.7040174141 60.3974514979 59% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 102.818181818 118.986275619 86% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.2727272727 23.4991977007 86% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.68181818182 5.21951772744 147% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 7.80617977528 26% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 10.2758426966 146% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 5.13820224719 39% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.83258426966 103% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.182908032835 0.243740707755 75% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0440989985737 0.0831039109588 53% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0409542251978 0.0758088955206 54% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0982429346266 0.150359130593 65% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0322615241965 0.0667264976115 48% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.6 14.1392134831 89% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 51.18 48.8420337079 105% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 12.1743820225 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.13 12.1639044944 100% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.13 8.38706741573 97% => OK
difficult_words: 99.0 100.480337079 99% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 11.8971910112 101% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.2143820225 89% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.


Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.