Q... In countries like Japan, the population is getting older, are the effects of aging population on society is negative or positive. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
The advancement in technology improved the life expectancy of people. As a result, the number of old age people is significantly increased. These aged population, has both positive and negative impacts on society. I feel it has more adverse effect than positive impacts.
To begin with, graying population can be detrimental to the society as a whole, with its impacts on health care, labor market, economic productivity and on taxation. Firstly, there may not be enough people to work. The work force would be less productive and would have a negative impact on country’s economy. This scenario would compel the government to seek foreign labor and services. Secondly, employed senior citizens would close down employment opportunities for young adults. Thirdly, there will not be enough young people to look after the aged people. They might have to move old age homes.
Another point is that, elder people don’t buy many things or spend a lot of money. This also will reduce the economic growth. Lastly, the financial burden of the Government will surge. They may allocate more money for pension payment, medical allowances, maintaining old age homes and other concessions for senior citizens. They cannot earn lot and less tax return. All these, badly effects the society.
However, not all effects have to be negative. There are some advantages in having lots of experience in life and work. Moreover, some are extremely wise and experienced to take the responsibility to govern an important institution or even a country and lead to prosperity. Additionally, elder people can teach their grand children well. They drive carefully, may reduce the road accidents, not steal or fight, diminish conflicts, and will be less competition for jobs or other needs.
In conclusion, we should appreciate the beauty and potential of the youth and the advice and experience of the old. However, a society with young generation will progress fast.
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Comments
Additionally, elder people
Additionally, elder people can teach their grand children well. -->I think teach is unclear what they teach --> Additionally, elder people can teach discipline, good behaviour, moral values and motivation stories to their grand children.
Overall excellent essay!.
Sentence: All these, badly effects the society.
Description: The fragment , All these,badly effects is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace effects with affect
flaws:
No. of Words: 315 350
Avg. Sentence Length: 13.125 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.812 7.5
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.05 0.07
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 7.5 out of 9
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 24 15
No. of Words: 315 350
No. of Characters: 1574 1500
No. of Different Words: 184 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.213 4.7
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No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 57 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 37 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
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Sentence Length SD: 5.812 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.625 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.246 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.457 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.05 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5