The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australia men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Essay topics:

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australia men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The given bar chart shows the percentage of men and women in different age group who did regular participate in the physical activies in 2010.

Overall, we can see clearly that there are many changes in the physical activites in different age group of both men and women who living in Australia. Firstly, many men are very interested in the physical activities, which have the tend to drop slightly when they become to the mature and aged from 25 to 34 years old and older. However, the men who over 45 years old are often participate in the physical activities and this number is increasing gradually and gain 46.7% in 65 and over age group.

Secondly, the young women do not often participate in many physical activities when we compare with the people in mature age group. This number of percentage of women doing regular physical activity gain 52.5% and this show the tend to decrease slightly in the older groups.

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Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
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IELTS Writing Task I - IELTS Academic

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 230, Rule ID: A_INFINITVE[1]
Message: Probably a wrong construction: a/the + infinitive
... in the physical activities, which have the tend to drop slightly when they become to th...
^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 225, Rule ID: A_INFINITVE[1]
Message: Probably a wrong construction: a/the + infinitive
...sical activity gain 52.5% and this show the tend to decrease slightly in the older group...
^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, firstly, however, if, second, secondly

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 4.0 7.0 57% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 1.0 1.00243902439 100% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 6.8 118% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 3.15609756098 222% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 7.0 5.60731707317 125% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 24.0 33.7804878049 71% => OK
Nominalization: 0.0 3.97073170732 0% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 768.0 965.302439024 80% => OK
No of words: 161.0 196.424390244 82% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.7701863354 4.92477711251 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.56210296601 3.73543355544 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.4773344678 2.65546596893 93% => OK
Unique words: 84.0 106.607317073 79% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.521739130435 0.547539520022 95% => OK
syllable_count: 241.2 283.868780488 85% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.45097560976 103% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 1.53170731707 131% => OK
Article: 3.0 4.33902439024 69% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 1.07073170732 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 0.482926829268 0% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 3.36585365854 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 6.0 8.94146341463 67% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 26.0 22.4926829268 116% => OK
Sentence length SD: 15.9312760178 43.030603864 37% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 128.0 112.824112599 113% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.8333333333 22.9334400587 117% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.5 5.23603664747 143% => OK
Paragraphs: 3.0 3.83414634146 78% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 2.0 1.69756097561 118% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 3.70975609756 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 1.13902439024 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.09268292683 24% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.353023421468 0.215688989381 164% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.202487410563 0.103423049105 196% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.140119033854 0.0843802449381 166% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.301578392786 0.15604864568 193% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.139011380506 0.0819641961636 170% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.5 13.2329268293 110% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 53.55 61.2550243902 87% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.51609756098 135% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 10.3012195122 119% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.68 11.4140731707 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.18 8.06136585366 89% => OK
difficult_words: 23.0 40.7170731707 56% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 11.4329268293 122% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 10.9970731707 113% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 11.0658536585 136% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.