Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required.
Discuss both these views and give your opinion.
Nowadays public health become the important problem for people. Some believe that by rising the quantity of sports facilities could solve this problem but others opinion is to search effective measurements. In my opinion government and society should do some steps together to tackle this drawback.
There is no duobt that, sedentary lifestyle, long working hours especially stressful working conditions are the main causes for unhealthy lifestyle. As well, this unhealthy lifestyle creats risks to obesity and some kind of disease such as heart disease. Therefore, we need various sport places to make active life and thus some believe that variety of sports can make useful changes.
On the other hand, people who work long hours could not go to the gym because of time. Beside the time people have location problems. Sometimes people could not find suitable sport facilities in near areas. In addition, not all people love to do exercises in their leisure time. For instance, some of my friends do not attend pysichal education lesson during study years. That is why, some support idea that sport is not solution.
In my view, government must encourage people in all ages to active life. For example, we can see some free sport techniques in parks which citizens can use it in their free time. Additionally, government could impose high taxes to high-fat food products, alcohol and tobacco. Society can make some companies to discourage youths from unhealthy foods.Then, employers can establish teams from employees and take matches in team sports at weekends. For instance, when I worked, we played football with colleagues 2 times in a month.
In conclusion, increasing the number of sports facilities is not enaugh to make progress in public health. Society and government must work together to get good results.
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Nowadays public health become the important problem for people.
Nowadays public health becomes the important problem for people.
by rising the quantity of sports facilities could solve this problem
by rising the quantity of sports facilities it could solve this problem
rising the quantity of sports facilities could solve this problem
That is why, some support idea that sport is not solution.
That is why some support the idea that sport is not the solution.
in parks which citizens can use it in their free time.
in parks where citizens can use it in their free time.
Sentence: Some believe that by rising the quantity of sports facilities could solve this problem but others opinion is to search effective measurements.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to others and opinion
some kind of disease such as heart disease.
some kind of diseases such as heart disease.
Sentence: There is no duobt that, sedentary lifestyle, long working hours especially stressful working conditions are the main causes for unhealthy lifestyle.
Error: duobt Suggestion: doubt
Sentence: As well, this unhealthy lifestyle creats risks to obesity and some kind of disease such as heart disease.
Error: creats Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: For instance, some of my friends do not attend pysichal education lesson during study years.
Error: pysichal Suggestion: physical
Sentence: In conclusion, increasing the number of sports facilities is not enaugh to make progress in public health.
Error: enaugh Suggestion: enough
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 296 350
No. of Characters: 1484 1500
No. of Different Words: 178 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.148 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.014 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.455 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 116 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 80 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 54 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 35 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 15.579 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 4.945 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.632 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.295 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.53 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.075 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5