The spread of multinational companies and the resulting increase of globalization produce positive effects to everyone. Do you agree or disagree?

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The spread of multinational companies and the resulting increase of globalization produce positive effects to everyone. Do you agree or disagree?

In modern society, almost companies tend to extend their business to abroad. Some people insist that this phenomenon would take benefits, but the others not. I believe that globalization of companies contribute to countries which are being considered as undeveloped yet.

To begin with, it lets the competitive power of the countries that those have allowed to invest money into the same categories of industry. This is because almost companies which are trying to expand their business broader operate with enormous money. As the result of this, the domestic companies with less assets are not affordable the salary as much as the globalized companies. This is the critical factor to decrease the competitive power what I stated.

However, in point of view by the customers, they can buy products cheaper because of those had been made without high price of raw materials as well as relatively high wages. In addition, in case of undeveloped nations, they can raise the unemployment rate by the invested money from the globalized companies. Since the undeveloped countries are struggling the lack of money, they are inadequate to hire a lot of people, putting money into resource development. However, it becomes possible to do those things using the amount of money following by the globalization of foreign companies.

To sum up, expanding business to the world affect positive effect on the undeveloped countries. It could contribute to develop resources or be the solution for unemployment rate. For all those reason, I strongly agree the globalization of companies.

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almost companies tend to extend their business
most companies tend to extend their business

I believe that globalization of companies contribute to countries
I believe that the globalization of companies contributes to countries

it lets the competitive power of the countries that those have allowed to invest money into the same categories of industry.
Description: can you re-write this sentence?

almost companies which are trying to expand their business
most companies which are trying to expand their business

to decrease the competitive power what I stated.
to decrease the competitive power that I stated.

because of those had been made without high price of raw materials
Description: Check out books on how to use 'because of'

expanding business to the world affect positive effect
expanding business to the world affects positive effects

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
No. of Words: 252 350

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 252 350
No. of Characters: 1290 1500
No. of Different Words: 144 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.984 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.119 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.832 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 95 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 73 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 57 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 40 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.632 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.429 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.335 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.554 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.034 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5

it lets the competitive power of the countries that those have allowed to invest money into the same categories of industry.
Description: can you re-write this sentence?

I meant that if the foriegn company expand their business on the undeveloped nations, competitive power of undeveloped countries would get down in the same cacatagories of industry. For example, if the USA expand their business into my country and they offer the food cheaper, our competitive power of the food industry would be going down.