These days more fathers stay at home and take care of their children while mothers go out to work. what could be the reasons for this ? Do u think it is a positive or a negative development?
There has been a trend that more female go to work while males take the parental role at home. The main drivers for this could be the increase in female’s education level and the progress in gender equality. In my opinion, this tendency will benefit both the families and the society as a whole.
There are several reasons why the proportion of females entered the labor market has increased while that of males dropped correspondently. First, over the years, the education level female received has improved dramatically. It was only a few decades ago, females were considered naturally to take all the household responsibilities at home and thus there was no need for them to acquire qualifications and working skills. However, nowadays, most females in the developed countries have a comparable degree as males do. Therefore, it is almost obvious that there has been more females entering the labor market and squeezed out some of the jobs for the male employees. As a results, those men will take care of the children and do the housework at home. The second reason is that it is more acceptable for men to stay at home while his wife goes out to work due to the gender equity progress. In the past, it was embarrassing for both men and women if the husband didn’t have a job and live only depends on the earning of his wife.
Draw on the main reasons we discussed above, I believe that the trend is a positive development. On the one hand, couples now can choose their preferred responsibility regardless of their sex. They could also decided who goes to work based on the income level. In this case, each party gets their favorite role and the overall happiness for the family will be higher. On the other hand, it also contribute to the development of the society. Because each party choose to work based on the passion and ability, the society will then have the most passionate and capable workforce and this will boost the efficiency and productivity of the society. Also, the right to choose to take which responsibility also reflect the progress of social equality and fairness.
Therefore, I am convinced that the trend is positive as it not only benefits the families but also contribute to the development of the society.
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the right to choose to take which responsibility also reflect the progress of social equality and fairness.
the right to choose to take which responsibility also reflects the progress of social equality and fairness.
it not only benefits the families but also contribute to the development of the society.
it not only benefits the families but also contributes to the development of the society.
Sentence: There are several reasons why the proportion of females entered the labor market has increased while that of males dropped correspondently.
Error: correspondently Suggestion: No alternate word
flaws:
'On the other hand' means 'However'. It doesn't mean 'On another hand'.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 7.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 389 350
No. of Characters: 1810 1500
No. of Different Words: 193 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.441 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.653 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.622 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 112 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 93 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 58 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 36 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.474 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.572 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.737 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.3 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.475 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.075 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5