Today, the high sales of popular consumer goods reflects the power of advertising and not the real needs of the society in which they are sold. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Today, the high sales of popular consumer goods reflects the power of advertising and not the real needs of the society in which they are sold. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Following the globalization era, people make electronic tools with technology to help do activities. Now, world has visualization term. It means, people provide products to our consumer by broadcast. For example, a company of mobile phone products new model and new type, a company make video about that cell phone and broadcast to our civilization in worldwide. I think, it gives more cros for all population in this world.

Broadcast is another tools to make someone interest about that product. It works to sell company products. But, people will think to focus for complete that need and will forget other people. Someone will be enjoy to buy something tools with new technology while give attention for friends or family members.

Secondly, It is an indication about money. People think money is everything. Because, if someone interest a stuff and want it, so, he or she need money to buy it. It makes people have big drive to get much money with another ways like steal money from bank, corruption government money or sell mother jewelry. Crime will be increase if people fail to push that drive.

The last, a country will have a consumerism civilization. A country import more stuff and population forget the task for country. For example, people choose to work hard for get more money while make country has stabilization in economic area. Because, more people buy more tools from overseas it makes economic will decline.

To sum up, people have to know that an important things must have, want to have and no need levels. People should to push the consumerism for tersier necessary.

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Comments

a company make video about that cell phone
a company makes video about that cell phone

Broadcast is another tools
Broadcast is another tool

Someone will be enjoy to buy something tools with new technology while give attention for friends or family members.
Someone will be enjoying to buy some tools with new technology while giving attention for friends or family members.

if someone interest a stuff and want it,
if someone is interested in a stuff and wants it,

with another ways
with another way
with other ways

Crime will be increase
Crime will be increasing
Crime will increase

while make country has stabilization in economic area
while it makes the country to have stabilization in economic area

people have to know that an important things must have
people have to know that an important thing must have

Sentence: People should to push the consumerism for tersier necessary.
Error: tersier Suggestion: ?

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 8 2
Avg. Sentence Length: 13.4 21.0

Read a good grammar book.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.5 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 8 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 268 350
No. of Characters: 1284 1500
No. of Different Words: 141 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.046 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.791 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.51 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 82 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 61 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 38 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 26 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 13.4 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.248 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.45 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.304 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.529 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.077 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5