When a country develops its technology, the traditional skills and ways of life die out. It is pointless
to try and keep them alive.
To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Singapore is one of the richest country in Asia and known for its "first world" category in terms of technology. Other old folks noticed the difference on how people lived before and concerned that the traditional values might gone forever. In my opinion, I agree that these old behavior may no longer seen in the future.
To begin with, advance nations were trying to keep their status symbol as one of the developed states. However, it compromises most of its old moral principles and let the technology rule on the lives of the society. Children does not play outside and socialize with others. Same goes with the adults who spend most of their precious time playing online games and looking on their phones staking somebody else's. Most people prefer having an upgraded device or getting an appliance that can multi-task to make their lives conveniently easier.
Furthermore, local traditions should pass from one generation to another. Values such as being courteous and giving to those who are in need. Knowing your neighborhood and make friends with them. Respect someone's belief and more sensitive on what it is happening around. These are the few traits to keep the history alive.
To conclude, technology has kept on updating and as it daunting it may sound, possible that it can take over the humanity in the future generation. Although, the citizens should still be in control and do not let this advance technologies kill their values and traditions.
Singapore is one of the richest country in Asia
Singapore is one of the richest countries in Asia
Sentence: Other old folks noticed the difference on how people lived before and concerned that the traditional values might gone forever.
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by a verb, past participle
Suggestion: Refer to might and gone
these old behavior may no longer seen in the future.
these old behaviors may be no longer seen in the future.
Children does not play outside and socialize with others
Children do not play outside and socialize with others
Sentence: Same goes with the adults who spend most of their precious time playing online games and looking on their phones staking somebody else's. Most people prefer having an upgraded device or getting an appliance that can multi-task to make their lives conveniently easier.
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to can and multi-task
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Words: 245 350
Minimum 250 words wanted.
The essay doesn't address the essay topic well.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.5 out of 9
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 245 350
No. of Characters: 1193 1500
No. of Different Words: 161 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.956 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.869 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.476 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 87 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 59 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 38 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 25 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.5 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.765 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.571 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.286 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.526 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.022 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5