The amount of time spend on sport and exercise should be increased in school in order to tackle the problem of overweight children?
Do you think this the best way to deal with the problem?
What other solution can you suggest?
K.W.
One of today’s most controversial issues about health is overweight, as the result of overeating and less exercise, especially among children in developed countries. Overweight makes the risk to become crucial disease very higher. With easy access to a variety of food, more and more people eat for joy over the necessity. Also, development of transportation and wide-spread indoor entertainment like video game and internet shortened the time which children spend on physical activity. If it is because, this paper discusses if the often-proposed solution that school expand the time for sport and exercise is useful and if there is another way to solve this problem.
I really think increasing the opportunity to do exercise and sport is one of good ways to improve exercise habit though healthy eating is needed to foster as well. As children spend almost half of their active time in school, school gives a crucial influence on their behavior both in and out of class. I mean that schools should just offer various ways to play physically and let them know its enjoyability and importance rather than make children do hard exercise.
If they find a point of exercise, it will be their habit.
However, only encouraging children to work out is not enough. We have to deal with bad eating habit, too. In my opinion, programs for the first parenting today held in many places has a role for this problem. It is important for healthy eating of a child that parents understand the necessity and knowledge about it. In the society where new parents have less someone to rely on like their parents nearby, that kind of program or workshop is nice opportunity for them to acquire the awareness of healthy meal and appropriate knowledge.
In short, to deal with the problem of overeating among children, schools should expand their role to teach children joy and necessity of exercise more. In addition, it is needed to foster parents’ awareness about well-balanced, nutritious and appropriate amount of meal for children through programs for parents.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2019-07-16 | kindaiIELTS | 78 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 8, column 153, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...ren joy and necessity of exercise more. In addition, it is needed to foster parent...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, however, if, really, so, well, i mean, in addition, in short, kind of, in my opinion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 13.1623246493 84% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 7.85571142285 38% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 10.4138276553 144% => OK
Relative clauses : 6.0 7.30460921844 82% => OK
Pronoun: 25.0 24.0651302605 104% => OK
Preposition: 52.0 41.998997996 124% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.3376753507 84% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1729.0 1615.20841683 107% => OK
No of words: 340.0 315.596192385 108% => OK
Chars per words: 5.08529411765 5.12529762239 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.29407602571 4.20363070211 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.81827175931 2.80592935109 100% => OK
Unique words: 191.0 176.041082164 108% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.561764705882 0.561755894193 100% => OK
syllable_count: 533.7 506.74238477 105% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 5.43587174349 147% => OK
Article: 0.0 2.52805611222 0% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.10420841683 190% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.76152304609 126% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 16.0721442886 100% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.2975951904 103% => OK
Sentence length SD: 51.0364070419 49.4020404114 103% => OK
Chars per sentence: 108.0625 106.682146367 101% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.25 20.7667163134 102% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.0625 7.06120827912 86% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.38176352705 114% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.01903807615 20% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.67935871743 115% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.9879759519 100% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 3.4128256513 59% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.253373099032 0.244688304435 104% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0780269878552 0.084324248473 93% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0709515242612 0.0667982634062 106% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.133691776689 0.151304729494 88% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0738120913334 0.056905535591 130% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.2 13.0946893788 101% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 50.2224549098 100% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 11.3001002004 102% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.24 12.4159519038 99% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.35 8.58950901804 97% => OK
difficult_words: 79.0 78.4519038076 101% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 9.78957915832 123% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.1190380762 103% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.7795591182 111% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 78.6516853933 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.