My unforgettable moment

Essay topics:

My unforgettable moment

So difficult for us to do not make a moment every day, everyone cannot deny our behavior will be a moment. Whatever something is done by people, wherever they do it, those all is case who will be moment, for example we get a dinner together with my family, friends or sweetie, and it will be moment for us. Someday we were looked person, and he is handsome, brown skin, smart, kind men, polite, respect, friendly and then we always remember him, the case can called unforgettable moment. Not only I but also you must have experience and it so difficult for we can forget it.

Every people has a moment so different about their experience, there are happy, sad, proud, funny, affected and etc. Sometimes our experience is strange thing that another people never do it, and very rarely found in fact life. But generally people have unforgettable moment which they fell the case is special thing. For example our first love, it most generally the experience who had by people.

And this is my unforgettable moment. Before I tell my story better I would like to introduce myself, my name is Khaedar, and I am from West Java. This moment began when I studied in senior high school. That time before I and my friends did national exam, I was looked for new friend for invited and joined with us in order to our exam can success which that my friend acquainted me with her. Her name is Aidatul, she is from central java.

I date with her only around seven mounts but I fell so difficult to forget it because I intend to make her become my wife. During I date with her one by one a problem came us, but one day we has a problem and because of it our relationship became broken, and until now I never meet and each contact with her at all. That is my unforgettable moment for me, and from it I can acquire much benefit, I can think more mature. Thanks to Allah given me a life lesson so important for me.

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2014-05-03 i khaedar 83 view

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Sentence: Someday we were looked person, and he is handsome, brown skin, smart, kind men, polite, respect, friendly and then we always remember him, the case can called unforgettable moment.
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by a verb, past participle
Suggestion: Refer to can and called

Sentence: Every people has a moment so different about their experience, there are happy, sad, proud, funny, affected and etc. Sometimes our experience is strange thing that another people never do it, and very rarely found in fact life.
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to another and people

Sentence: But generally people have unforgettable moment which they fell the case is special thing.
Description: The fragment But generally people is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace generally with adjective

Sentence: For example our first love, it most generally the experience who had by people.
Description: A noun, singular, common is not usually followed by a determiner, possessive
Suggestion: Refer to example and our

Sentence: That time before I and my friends did national exam, I was looked for new friend for invited and joined with us in order to our exam can success which that my friend acquainted me with her.
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to can and success

Sentence: I date with her only around seven mounts but I fell so difficult to forget it because I intend to make her become my wife.
Description: The word date is not usually used as a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to date

Sentence: During I date with her one by one a problem came us, but one day we has a problem and because of it our relationship became broken, and until now I never meet and each contact with her at all.
Description: A preposition is not usually followed by a pronoun, personal, nominative, not 3rd person singular
Suggestion: Refer to During and I
Description: The word date is not usually used as a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to date

Sentence: Thanks to Allah given me a life lesson so important for me.
Description: The fragment Allah given me is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace given with verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 9 2

Read a good grammar book.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 9 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 353 350
No. of Characters: 1495 1500
No. of Different Words: 189 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.335 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.235 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.326 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 99 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 53 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 30 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 20 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.062 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.003 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.625 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.364 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.565 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.216 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5